The Importance of Being True to Yourself

I heard it, I loved it and I sat down to write. A few powerful words, woven together so wisely, that capture an entire way of life- one that leads to fulfillment and success. It's quite broad in concept, yet Rabbi Menachem Mendel of Kotzk distilled it into just a few lines:

“If I am I because I am I,
And you are you because you are you,
Then I am I, and you are you.

But if I am I because you are you,
And you are you because I am I,
Then I am not I, and you are not you!”

Wow. Incredible. Brilliant words (also sung beautifully by Udi Damari and Mendy Jerufi).

How many people go through life based on what others might think, without even realizing it? Ask yourself honestly: are you really living according to your inner self, your authentic "I"? Only the ones who are truly fulfilled in life are living this way. How many dreams have you given up on without even noticing?

Take a look inward and ask yourself: “What do I want to be when I grow up?” Yes, really, even if you're sixty years old. At any age, give yourself permission to think like a child again- where everything is still possible, and life is wide open ahead of you.

This type of thinking helps reveal the true you, not the “you” shaped by others. And from that place- and I say this from experience- working with many people and through my own inner journey, there are usually two outcomes:

1. Everything is possible, even if you’re certain it’s not. You just need the courage to try, despite the fear.

2. Maybe the dream isn’t entirely possible, but even 50% of it can be wonderful, (especially when the current alternative is nothing). Or maybe you can replace the dream with something that gives you the same satisfaction. Just ask yourself: What does this dream give me? What value does it fulfill in me? Then find other ways to meet that need.

Recently I sat with someone who is going through this amazing transformation. With a background of social anxiety, they’re finally beginning to dare to live as their true self, not as who they felt they needed to be. It’s moving to witness such a process of becoming. Finally they feel like they’re being who they really are, instead of what was imposed on them that never really fit. Every person has a unique, authentic “I” within- one that’s calling out, longing to exist. And let me tell you, it’s a wonderful feeling to be.

Be who you are, so that you can feel like yourself!