How to Live a Fulfilling Life Despite Emotional Struggles

As human beings we are all seeking ways to live a full, satisfying, and evolving life, despite the reality that we undoubtedly face difficulties, obstacles, and negative emotions that seem to hold us back.

Our life is like a bus, and we are the drivers. From the moment we gain self-awareness, we strive to drive the bus of our lives toward our values of joy, meaning, serving G-d, and so on. Living according to our values fills us with satisfaction, and we want to continue this journey for the rest of our lives.

Along the way, there are bus stops where other passengers board. These are our life experiences. Some of these passengers are pleasant such as successes, uplifting events and achievements. These passengers are supportive and encouraging. They sit in the back and cheer us on: "Go ahead! You can reach your destination of happiness and fulfillment. Look at me, I’m proof you’re on the right track!"

Then come the “difficult passengers” which are negative experiences and emotions. These include feelings of anxiety, depression, low motivation, OCD, relationship issues, and others. These passengers board with dark, intimidating stares and sit right behind us. They yell at us: "Stop the bus! You’ll never make it! Look how awful you feel! You don’t stand a chance!"

At this point, many of us panic and try to kick them off the bus by arguing with them, ignoring them, and pushing them away. Often, we find that this only makes them louder and more disruptive. Worse, while we’re distracted trying to fight them off, we’re no longer steering the bus. We miss exits and turns and we stop moving toward our goals.

This is the mistake.
These negative passengers can’t be thrown off so easily, and when we recognize this, the path to success is different. We can choose to turn around, look those passengers in the eye, acknowledge how they make us feel, and accept that they’re here for now. Without fighting them, we can simply say: "Yes, I see you. I feel what you bring. And I’m still driving."

No one can actually take the wheel from us. The only thing stopping us is the fear we create inside ourselves. If we stop being afraid of fear and if we’re willing to feel pain, discomfort, or sadness, we immediately neutralize part of the problem. Often, the negative emotion shrinks and fades on its own.

This process, supported by research in the field of mindfulness, has been shown to be highly effective for coping with anxiety and emotional distress. In fact, when we stop resisting the “difficult passengers,” they often leave the bus on their own.

When a person remains focused on their values, and is willing to "pay the price" of tolerating discomfort, they can experience happiness, growth, and success, and life becomes smoother and more fulfilling.