Choosing a School: A Life-Shaping Decision

When selecting a school for our children, we must remember that this is the place where they will be spending nearly half of each day, for many years. These are among the most formative years of their lives that shape their personality, mental and physical health, and academic development.

School choice should therefore never be based merely on convenience, such as proximity to home, a beautiful building, a spacious yard, a modern gym, or a famous alumni list.

Many parents tend to make this decision for superficial reasons, especially with their first child- without properly weighing what truly matters. They also may not realize that a school that succeeded in the past, when they themselves were students, may not be the same today.

What are the core qualities of a quality educational institution?

Everyone will agree that a high-quality school must provide the following:

1. A reasonably safe and secure physical environment for the child.

2. A moral and ethical education, emphasizing good character traits such as respect for others, honoring parents and teachers, personal development, tools for handling life’s challenges, and the ability to cope with crises- accompanied by real, proven outcomes.

3. Academic knowledge that ensures the child’s educational advancement.

A closer look reveals that the first two are even more important than the third. If a school cannot protect a child’s life or health, or if it exposes them to harmful influences, then we are unable to entrust them to that school, regardless of the academic record.

In schools where violence is rising, academic standards tend to fall. This is likely due to:

• Time lost from class being used to control discipline rather than teach.

• Students who are afraid for their safety cannot concentrate effectively.

• Students may avoid school entirely due to fear of peer violence.

Studies in the U.S. show that girls in mixed-gender classrooms often feel secondary, or even threatened, and cannot focus properly. The boys, too, are distracted. When separated into single-gender classrooms, academic performance improved, especially for the girls.

Even if a school aspires to academic excellence, and even if it uses high-level textbooks, if there is no peace, focus, or joy in coming to school, academic achievement will suffer.

Based on reports, studies, and observations of schools across the country, one conclusion stands out: A parent who truly desires a quality education, a safe and healthy environment, and strong academic performance, can only find all three in a Torah-based school. (This does not refer to state-religious schools, which sadly often expose children to the same harmful influences as secular public schools.)

This holds true regardless of whether the parent identifies as secular, traditional, or religious.

What If the School Influences the Home?

Some parents worry that enrolling in a Torah-based school might bring changes to the home environment. Even if such aspects arise, they are usually small and manageable, such as lighting Shabbat candles or making Kiddush. Many parents even come to appreciate these traditions.

Moreover, this is a small "sacrifice" compared to the enormous benefit of raising a child who knows about honor and kindness and who grows up in a safe social environment, free from drugs, extortion, dangerous games, cults, and all the other evils that sadly exist in many non-religious schools today.