Afraid of Gehinnom, What to Do?

Ortal (a pseudonym) asks: "I am very afraid of Gehinnom, a fear that makes me feel that no matter what, there will be accusations and punishments against us. What can be done? I always remind myself that Hashem loves us, but it doesn't resonate with me... Moreover, I always feel that it's pointless to invest effort because in a moment I'll die anyway. This keeps me from investing and progressing in life. How can I break free from this? I'd appreciate an answer, thank you in advance."

Hello and blessings Ortal,

First of all, it's important to understand that Gehinnom is not a physical place, and the depictions by our Sages about Gehinnom are allegorical, meant to help us understand the concepts within our grasp and intellect.

When you reach the World to Come at the age of 120, G-d willing, your entire worldview will change because you will be a spiritual soul without a body, and then you will also be able to understand the celestial calculations and see things you couldn't see and understand in this world. As a soul, you will have spiritual strengths that you don't have now, and then you'll know with certainty that everything was worthwhile and good for you, unlike in this world where things are not understood and appear harsh and cruel.

Imagine a woman who becomes pregnant, knowing she will endure the pains of childbirth, but she also knows that this suffering leads to the most beautiful and wonderful thing in her life, so she is willing to go through it. Similarly, many people are willing to go through great suffering and hardships in their lives to achieve their goals. The whole world is built on sacrifice for noble and important purposes. This is our process of purification, construction, and development as souls and as human beings.

And what is the greatest and most beautiful goal in life, if not to merit drawing close to Hashem and connecting to His Divine Presence in Gan Eden?

To achieve this noble goal, Hashem sometimes brings us suffering and hardships that teach us and atone for our wrongdoings.

Just as every surgery performed by a surgeon is for the benefit of the person, and we should thank the surgeon who heals us, so too are suffering meant to correct, purify, and advance the souls to higher and eternal happiness.

Would a paralyzed person remain paralyzed all his life if he could undergo a painful surgery that lasts only a month, and afterward he could walk for the rest of his life? Surely he would undergo the surgery, because the result is a full life. Not only that, but the patient would even thank the "pain-inducing" doctor because he knows the surgery was for the greatest benefit of his rectification. So too in the World to Come, we will reveal that all we go through is for our rectification, and we will know what we are correcting and for what, and we will thank Hashem even for the sufferings because Hashem is the surgeon who repairs us for the life of the World to Come.

In any situation, we must trust in Hashem, who does everything with mercy and for the good, and accept everything with love. We must put ourselves in the hands of the Creator of the World like a baby in the hands of its mother. Even if a mother takes the baby to the doctor for a shot, the baby doesn't stop loving the mother because he intrinsically knows that everything she does is for his benefit and out of love, not hatred. We too, as sons and daughters of Hashem, must trust in Him. Through trust, we overcome all difficulties and fears.

Additionally, the merciful Hashem allows us to correct our sins in this world and not receive Gehinnom in the World to Come - through repentance, prayer, and charity. For this purpose, we also received Yom Kippur, which atones every year. And many small and big sufferings that we go through in our lives are meant to atone for our transgressions, so we are not punished for them in the World to Come. Everything is done for our benefit, so that we arrive in the World to Come complete and rectified as much as possible, without the need for additional purifications.

All this life is a process of learning and progression, and every day we continue to fulfill mitzvot and progress. Please read the following articles:

If a Loving Father - Why Does It Hurt?
https://www.hidabroot.org/he/article/99775
Abba Katan and Abba Gadol - How to Look at Hashem?
https://www.hidabroot.org/he/article/95502
Answer to the Question of Job:
https://www.hidabroot.org/he/article/88622

Regarding your constant fear of death, which prevents you from progressing in life, I am concerned that these things sound like an issue that has not yet been addressed, and it is important to consult a psychologist to assess the severity of the situation and treat it.

In any case, do not despair, and trust in Hashem who always wants your well-being in every situation and guides you in life in a way that benefits you the most. It is advisable to persist in prayer and feel the love of Hashem.

Please watch the following video, and see additional strengthening videos on the side:

https://www.hidabroot.org/he/video/61711