Seeking Ways to Guard Your Speech? 3 Tips from the Chafetz Chaim

Rabbi Israel Meir Kagan, known as the "Chafetz Chaim" after his book, wrote his work on guarding one's speech. He writes in the introduction to his book that due to this sin, "there is corruption in all worlds and it darkens and diminishes their light... the corruption above is boundless." So how can we strengthen ourselves in this matter? Here are three tips from the 'Chafetz Chaim' (from "Guarding the Tongue" Part I, Chapter 3).

1. Adopt a New Habit: Avoid Talking About People

We should train ourselves not to talk about people, even idle chatter that isn't negative, because conversation tends to evolve and unintentionally lead to negative comments from one of the participants. The Chafetz Chaim explains "and if sometimes it is necessary to speak about someone, it should be in the shortest possible manner, and not prolong the conversation, so as not to come to prohibition."

2. Avoid Being Among Groups of People Who Are Not Careful With Gossip

It is common that in conversations with many participants, gossip comes up occasionally, especially among those who are not careful with their speech. Therefore, it is recommended to avoid staying among groups of such people, and here is the wording of the 'Chafetz Chaim': "One should be very careful not to stand among groups of people, and even if he needs something essential, he should shorten his stay unless he knows that there will be no forbidden speech among them. Even if the entire group consists of decent people, if one malicious person is present, he spoils the group and it is appropriate to withdraw from them."

3. Keep Away from Internet Sites that Publish Gossip and Slander

It is understood that in the time of the Chafetz Chaim, there was no internet, but he advises in his language: "The rule of thumb is that whoever wants to attain the quality of guarding one's speech should do the exact opposite of those who indulge in sensational talk, who often go around groups of people hoping to hear something that they can mock or repeat later to others. And they are also accustomed to always inquire about news occurring in the city between people. He, however, will act in the opposite way." We are all interested in news and want to stay updated on what is happening in our country or the world, and even receive interesting updates or knowledge from the world of science, culture, or family matters. However, to avoid reading gossip and slander, one should avoid exposure to sites that publish content prohibited by the Halacha, and find alternatives, such as for example, "Hidabroot".