Overcoming Social Anxiety: How One Woman Took Her Life Back

When you see the words “social anxiety” in the title of an article, what comes to mind? Do you picture someone shy, quiet, and extremely introverted? Well, think again.

Let me tell you a story.

About six months ago, a lovely woman came to my clinic. She was in her mid-twenties, beautiful, smiling, and very well put-together. The moment she started speaking, I realized she was also incredibly smart.

Sigal (not her real name) had been struggling for years with various symptoms without really understanding what they meant. She described a feeling of suffocation around people, difficulty speaking in public, and even a fear of eating in front of others. This lack of confidence was totally unlike her. She experienced rapid heartbeat, sweating, internal heat, shaking, and frequent blushing.

She told me she had already seen many professionals- psychologists, doctors, and various counselors. They all gave her the same response: “You just need to relax. You’re suffering from anxiety.” 

I saw clearly that Sigal was a young woman with immense potential and a deep desire to live a normal life. And yet, she couldn’t even open her mouth in front of others out of fear of blushing. She was gradually losing her self-confidence. She couldn’t ask questions during her university classes and was terrified of presenting her final project in front of the class. “Just the thought of it makes me want to bury myself in the ground,” she said.

“What can I do?” Sigal asked. “Is there a medication that can make this go away? How do I get rid of the blushing and shame? I feel like I’ve lost myself.”

I explained to her that the blushing is just a symptom, not the root problem. To treat the issue, we need to go deeper and understand the full picture.

After a comprehensive assessment and a long, in-depth conversation, it became clear that Sigal was suffering from social anxiety. This type of anxiety doesn’t just appear out of nowhere, but is triggered by something deep inside. Something had shaken her up so intensely that her body felt like it was in real danger.

Anyone familiar with the “Fight or Flight” mechanism knows that when the body senses danger (real or perceived), it activates a defense response. This internal alarm system leads to physical symptoms such as blushing, pressure, sweating, rapid heartbeat, and more.

Once we addressed the root cause, the blushing disappeared, and with it, the anxiety. We practiced breathing techniques and replaced negative thoughts with positive ones. After a meaningful process, Sigal was able to eat in public again, speak her mind confidently, participate in lectures, and ask questions, without fearing that she would blush. She finally got her life back.

Sometimes, just being like everyone else can be someone’s biggest dream. The power to heal and change lies in our hands. We just need to take the reins and make it happen.

Orly Samira is a couples counselor and CBT psychotherapist