Carrying Forward My Son's Legacy Through Acts of Kindness

Birthdays are typically joyful occasions, but when it marks the birth of someone kidnapped in Gaza whose remains were returned only a few months ago, the day becomes emotionally charged. Yet, the Bochstab family chooses to honor Yagav’s memory by organizing a special activity distributing cakes and winter supplies to those in need..

The Cake Journey Begins

"My son Yagav was kidnapped along with his wife Rimon to Gaza," shares Esther Bochstab, Yagav's mother, discussing the tragedy that altered her life. "Rimon returned in the first hostage deal, and we all awaited Yagav’s return. When his birthday came around last year on January 23, while he was still captive, we wanted a meaningful way to celebrate, knowing Yagav’s passion for social activism and outreach. We decided to bake birthday cakes and write on them a request for those who eat to pray for Yagav’s return.

We started small, but many cakes were eventually distributed throughout the country. They reached the homeless, Holocaust survivors, and at-risk youth—people often overlooked. We aimed to connect them to our cause of bringing home the kidnapped."

Esther mentions she was deeply moved by how these individuals, grappling with their challenges, managed to support her during that critical time. "People were sympathetic," she recounts. "They wished us well, prayed for Yagav, and offered much encouragement. It was truly moving.

One woman, a regular homeless person in Tel Aviv, asked permission to touch Yagav’s photo and told me she had always prayed for her survival; now she was asked to pray for someone else. I found that deeply touching and it reinforced the idea of mutual giving here."

Yagav Bochstab

Circle of Light

The birthday project’s success led to ongoing relationships with these individuals and organizations. "We embarked on a wonderful initiative for Purim with gift baskets and, later, hot meals for the homeless around Passover," Esther shares.

"Each time, I thought of Yagav. Years ago, we were on a family trip to Paris, and after lunch, Yagav carefully packed the leftover food and told his siblings: ‘Now you’re coming with me to distribute it to the homeless around our hotel.’ This unique story had been pushed to the back of my mind, but surfaced during our activities, illustrating clearly what Yagav would have wanted us to do in his honor."

Esther explains that now, a year into their efforts, they try to distribute hot meals every month to the homeless and other needy individuals. "Today, Thursday, is Yagav’s birthday," she points out. "Sadly, Yagav is not with us, but we continue our mission, with special dedication."

She pauses to recount with excitement how their birthday project grew beyond expectations: "We distributed over 1,000 cakes and socks and gloves to the homeless, asking everyone to pray for all the kidnapped’s quick return.

I must say that interacting with these people during distribution empowers me significantly and shows something good happening within Israeli society. We are forging connections with marginalized populations, and they’re joining us.

Today, for instance, I visited a place where women who have suffered violence stay, and they gave me an album with personal letters they wrote. I haven’t opened them yet because I’m too emotional, waiting until the birthday passes to read them and respond."

Does your amazing work alleviate the grief??

"No, the grief is a constant presence in our lives, deep and unlikely to leave. But during our activities, I feel Yagav with us on this mission. I truly feel and experience him; these are very special times where I’m sure he is joyful in the way we’re choosing to memorialize him—full of meaning and giving, just like him."