Chronic Pain: The Spiritual Side of Suffering

We conclude the series on chronic pain with a spiritual reflection on pain, which can significantly alter a person's approach and provide new hope and vitality.

The Torah tells us about our forefather Jacob, who tore his clothes and mourned for many days when he believed his beloved son Joseph had been devoured (Genesis 37:34). Our sages in the Midrash explain (Bereishit Rabbah 84:20): "Because Jacob held onto the sackcloth, he remained inseparable from his children and descendants." Mordechai's example, who donned sackcloth and ashes during the days of Ahasuerus when Haman the wicked sought to destroy the people of Hashem, resonates with this.

However, the "Chatam Sofer" questions (Drashot Chatam Sofer, Section 185, Volume 1): The Midrash seems to imply there was some complaint against Jacob for donning sackcloth. What was expected of him? How could a father not mourn when he believes his beloved son has been slain and taken at an early age?

Indeed, the "Chatam Sofer" resolves this by stating: A person's duty is to embrace all that befalls them with love and joy, knowing that suffering purifies them and brings them closer to their Creator. When one rejoices in their suffering, feeling happiness through closeness to Hashem from their hardships and pains, this very feeling becomes the source of salvation for that person, allowing them to emerge from darkness into light!

Our forefather Jacob faced many troubles in life. He suffered from his brother Esau, from Laban, and was distressed over Dinah's incident, yet he endured all these trials fully, rejoicing in the pain, knowing they drew him nearer to his Creator. But when confronted with the perceived death of Joseph, his beloved son, whom he thought was devoured by a wild beast, a special difficulty arose.

Why so? Rashi explains (Genesis 37:35), citing the Midrash: Jacob was told in prophecy that if a son died during his lifetime, he would face hell, but if none did, he would not. Believing Joseph had died before him, Jacob couldn't bear the pain, not just from Joseph's loss but also from the fear of encountering hell!

Nevertheless, because Jacob wore sackcloth and wept bitterly, instead of embracing the sorrow with love and joy, his children continued similarly, a path not leading to salvation. True salvation can only be achieved when accepting with love, patience, and joy every test that comes from the heavens!

One Act of Endurance - Surpasses Many Prayers!

Based on this, the "Chatam Sofer" presents a significant insight: "One act of endurance - surpasses many prayers!" Meaning, a person's willingness to bear a bit of suffering outweighs the value of numerous prayers!

He provides an example with Queen Esther, who invited Haman along with King Ahasuerus to her banquet. Clearly, Haman was not her preferred guest, yet she invited him to demonstrate her joy in suffering and her faith that salvation was near. She knew the secret that through embracing suffering with love, and faith in imminent salvation, one can indeed be redeemed!

This concept is echoed in the words of King David, the Sweet Singer of Israel, in the psalms speaking of Esther and Ahasuerus (Psalms 22:2): "My God, my God, why have You forsaken me? Why are You so far from saving me, from the words of my roaring?" The "Chatam Sofer" explicates: To know how distant your salvation is, consider "the words of your roaring." The more one complains and struggles to accept their suffering, the further they push salvation away!

Conversely, the prophet Isaiah says (Isaiah 12:1): "And you will say on that day, I will thank You, Hashem, for You were angry with me; Your anger has turned, and You comfort me." Meaning, when a person can thank for "Your anger with me," meaning to thank for their suffering and rejoice in it, then naturally, "Your anger turns and comforts me," and salvation is near!

The "Ohr HaChaim" Holy (Genesis 46:6) explains this is why the bondage of Egypt did not begin as long as one of the original descendents who went there survived (Shemot Rabbah 1:8), starting only after Joseph and his generation passed away.

The "Ohr HaChaim" elaborates that as long as those who went down to Egypt were alive, they "accepted" the exile, using the phrase: "The remedy for suffering is acceptance." With anyone accepting the suffering, it protected Israel from entering true bondage. But once all that generation passed away, and none were left to bear the suffering and exile, bondage commenced.

Indeed, Rabbi Yonah also writes in "Shaarei Teshuvah" (Gate 4, Sign 12) that through accepting divine judgment with love, one transforms judgment into mercy! Contradicting common belief that accepting suffering perpetuates it and causes further pain, the truth is the opposite: it is precisely through accepting suffering with love that one can be freed from it, turning judgment into mercy!

Thus, in summary: dealing with hardship, suffering, and pain holds a great advantage. None of us seeks suffering and difficulties, yet it is crucial to remember their value when they greet us. Amid hardship and pain, numerous methods can make coping easier, more bearable, and at least keep it within the true proportions of difficulty, without exceeding them!

Great Troubles

Ending this article fittingly with a wonderful teaching from the ethics instructors.

Deuteronomy (31:17) states: "[Hashem says:] My anger will blaze against it on that day. I will forsake them and hide My face from them, and they will be consumed, and many evils and troubles will find them, so that they will say on that day: 'Have not these evils come upon us because our G-d is not among us?'" Initially, "many evils and troubles" is mentioned, but it concludes with "evils" alone.

The ethical instructors explain that "evil" refers to the objective difficulty, whereas "trouble" signifies the individual's emotional reaction to the difficulty, as Onkelos translates "troubles" as "what oppresses a person."

As long as individuals attribute life's events to random chance, they suffer doubly—from the "evils" and additionally from the "troubles." However, when a person repents, recognizing that the evils stemmed from their actions, the power of faith relieves them of 'troubles'... The emotional struggle with the objective difficulty dissipates.

Moreover, if initially the evils were numerous, once a person repents and comprehends their significance, they aren't as overwhelming as initially perceived. The ability to address the problem better reduces its disruption to everyday life significantly.

Let us adopt these tools in everyday life, gaining a fresh perspective on challenges and struggles, and we will see our quality of life improve remarkably!