Sivan Rahav Meir: First Holocaust Remembrance Day Without Grandmother Ada of Blessed Memory

How Are You Returning from the Holidays?

Rabbi Shlomo Wolbe used to say that the "landing" after the holidays is also important. He compared it to a spacecraft returning to the atmosphere and noted that the moments of re-entry are very sensitive. We need to pay attention to how we return to daily life with all the "baggage" of the holiday, with all the decisions, insights, and everything we discovered about ourselves, our family, and more.

The new weekly Torah portion, Parshat "Kedoshim," gives us some guidance on how to land. It is one of the Torah portions with the highest number of mitzvot, and already in the daily segment, we encounter instructions such as: "...each person should fear his mother and father," "Do not turn to idols," "Do not steal, do not deny falsely, and do not lie to each other," "Do not swear falsely by My name," "Do not oppress your neighbor," "Do not steal," "Do not withhold the worker's wages overnight," "Do not curse the deaf or put a stumbling block before the blind." This is just the beginning.

The name of the parsha, "Kedoshim," is explained by many commentators as showing us how to be sacred – within the life of this world. Holiness is also reflected in paying workers on time, in the relationship with parents, and so forth. A successful landing!

 

Why Not Curse the Deaf?

Parshat "Kedoshim" continues to set demands before us, in all areas of life. One interesting commandment is "Do not curse the deaf." Why shouldn't we curse a deaf person? After all, they do not hear it. One could argue that the Torah demands we do not curse men, women, the elderly, and children, so why emphasize the deaf, who would not even be harmed if cursed? There are many explanations, but Maimonides explains it this way: "The Torah does not only care about the cursed, but also about the curser, warning that the soul of the curser should not reach vengeance or become accustomed to anger."

In other words, even if the cursed does not hear or know – the Torah cares about the soul of the one who curses. In some sense, whose state should be of more concern – the driver on the road who was yelled at or the driver who yelled? The referee who was cursed or the fan who cursed them?

Parshat "Kedoshim" raises the bar and argues that when it comes to harmful speech, it doesn't matter if the other side heard, was offended, or hurt by what was said. More attention should be given to the state of the speaker.

 

If You've Survived Pharaoh, Don't Become Pharaoh

Sadly, a child who is harmed often becomes a harming parent. A child who has suffered is likely to harm others. The Exodus from Egypt sought to dismantle this mechanism. To free the people of Israel from slavery to freedom means breaking this cycle where someone who suffered and then stops suffering begins to cause suffering to others. This is true for individuals and nations alike. "For you were strangers in the land of Egypt," is written in the daily segment of the parsha, in verses where the Torah reminds us of the proper attitude towards others and the weak. This reminder appears in the Torah repeatedly: remember what you went through, and don't continue this cycle of violence where only the strong survive.

If you survived Pharaoh and endured – it doesn't mean you have permission to become Pharaoh. Today, it could be said: if you survived Hitler – it doesn't legitimize doing everything just because you suffered. On the contrary. It obliges you to stop the chain, change direction, towards a Jewish value world of faith, commitment, and kindness.

 

The Holocaust and the Challenges That Follow

This is the first Holocaust Remembrance Day in my life without Grandmother Ada of blessed memory. Grandmother Ada Rosenstrauch, born in Piotrków, a survivor of Bergen-Belsen, passed away at the age of 94, about ten months ago. Until a ripe old age, she worked as a gymnastics teacher, a figure full of inspiration and strength. As a Holocaust survivor who lost many family members, Grandmother immigrated to Israel, to Haifa, and raised my father and his siblings with my grandfather.

"And you shall sanctify yourselves and be holy, because I am Hashem your God," is written in the daily segment of this week's Torah portion, Parshat "Kedoshim." What is holiness? We are accustomed to speaking about the Holy Martyrs of the Holocaust, referring to the six million murdered. But there was immense holiness also in the survivors' decision to cling to life, not to sink into despair. I read an interpretation that this is precisely what the Kaddish means: "May His great name grow and be sanctified – in other words, after loss, one should continue to grow life and the presence of the Creator in the world, to sanctify reality. Today – when people tragically lose a few family members, an entire nation accompanies them with care and love (we can only mention names like Rona Ramon, or Tamar Fogel, or the children of the Henkin couple, and unfortunately, there are more examples). Everyone embraces them.

And look, an entire generation of people like this, each an orphan who lost parents and siblings and home – found themselves coping without the attention of an entire nation. Millions of such survivors chose to rise from the ruins, to build and do and believe and continue and give birth and educate and learn and plant and love. It is a historic endeavor where from the depths of evil and impurity – they added goodness and holiness. Therefore, in a certain sense, the survivors too – including Grandmother Ada of blessed memory – are essentially holy martyrs of the Holocaust.

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