The Final Fulfillment: The True Secret of Lasting Happiness

In previous chapters, we explored various fulfillments of genuine joy granted to us by the Creator. We now turn to the final and perhaps most profound one: happiness.

There is nothing people pursue more than happiness. Around the world, billions are spent on studies attempting to understand what makes people truly happy. It’s the ultimate aim of economists, philosophers, sociologists, thinkers, and scientists alike.

Not a single person is exempt from this quest- we are all born with the intrinsic desire to be happy. Many theorists have developed charts, models, and endless hypotheses to define and quantify human needs in hopes of one day fulfilling them and making people happier.

And yet, very few search in the right place. If one begins the journey toward happiness while remaining focused on personal interests and desires, they will never reach it because there is no limit to what one might want. With this approach, there will always be a sense of lack.

The right to be happy is not a luxury or rare privilege, but a human obligation. The Torah commands us to be happy. How can someone command us to be happy? If someone is drowning in debt and abandoned by family and friends, how can that person be happy?

This is possible because happiness does not depend on what happens to us, but on how we perceive what happens to us.

In Genesis (1:31) we learn, “And G-d saw everything that He had made, and behold, it was very good.” Throughout the creation narrative, the Torah repeats, “And G-d saw that it was good.”

G-d, of course, knew His creation intimately- He didn’t need to double-check its quality. But the repetition teaches us that the world is inherently good. No matter what happens, the essence of creation remains good, because the Creator is inherently good.

If we see reality with truth, we will view it through a positive lens. Pessimism is simply a distortion. This is the first key to real happiness: trusting that even the difficult or painful events are part of a larger good, designed by G-d for a higher purpose- even if we don’t yet understand it.

How can we practice this perspective?

Firstly, by focusing on what we have, and not on what we lack. Only through this lens can we truly appreciate the good in our lives. There is an old Arabic saying: “I complained about not having nice shoes, until I met a man with no feet.” Sometimes we need external reminders to be grateful. Gratitude is a cornerstone of happiness.

Even when lacking, for example beautiful shoes, or any shoes at all- look at your feet, and give thanks that you have them! And what are feet compared to the entire body? And what is the body compared to the soul and its divine potential?

This is why Pirkei Avot teaches: “Who is rich? One who is happy with their portion.” Belief in this principle unlocks the ability to see all the good hidden in creation.

Happiness also flows from faith that everything we experience is part of G-d’s will and ultimately for our good. Even when we don’t understand the benefit of painful experiences, the knowledge that they are part of a larger plan can bring comfort. Sadness stems from confusion and lack of clarity, but faith offers relief, reminding us that if something happened, it needed to happen, and it was the best possible outcome, even if we can’t yet see why.

If you lost something valuable, if your engagement was called off, if a loved one passed, if you suffered injustice, know that it happened for your ultimate good. If it had happened differently, it would have been worse for you.

We must learn to give generously and expect little. The moment we choose to be givers, our inner value emerges, and with it, happiness. When I give without receiving, it means that I am complete and don’t need anything in return.

This mindset reveals our true worth.

Contrary to popular belief, happiness is not about pleasure. Rabbi Abraham Twerski gave a poignant example related to childbirth. Is a woman in labor experiencing pleasure? Certainly not. But is she happy? Absolutely. Her happiness comes from knowing she’s realizing her potential by bringing a new soul into the world, entrusted to her by G-d.

The secret of happiness is effort in the service of our true potential.

Indeed, happiness isn’t achieved overnight. It’s a struggle, but a fight worth engaging in. Like anything worthwhile, happiness is earned.

The peak of happiness lies in our connection to G-d. No matter who you are or what you’ve done, G-d loves you with perfect love. This is the reason He created you and recreates you every moment. He wants you to feel His presence- not only fear and awe because He is the Master of the universe, but closeness and intimacy, because He is always by your side.

If you paused, reflected, and felt His presence in this moment, you would feel joy. Imagine if you could always carry that feeling with you.

The fight for happiness begins early. Rabbi Nachman of Breslov taught that the battle begins with a smile. Even if it isn’t fully sincere- smile. A fake smile can awaken the genuine one within, which sometimes lies dormant. Smile at everyone you meet. Greet them with warmth and joy, and pass that energy along to others and to yourself.

From the book "Dan's Journey to the Meaning of Life" by Roni Dayan. To purchase the book at Hidabroot Shops, click here