Erasing Amalek: Fighting Doubt with Faith and Courage

This week we read Parshat Zachor, the portion about remembering Amalek.

Memory is the process of gathering information from our surroundings through the senses. With the help of the memories we collect, we form our worldview. Based on memory, we judge whether something is worth pursuing, make decisions, and take action. But these same memories can also trigger fear and doubt- making us hesitant about whether to attempt something or avoid it altogether.

This is precisely the role of Amalek- to sow doubt and fear within us. For example, someone wants to attend a job interview but hesitates: What if I don’t explain myself well enough? What if they don’t accept me? In cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), we work with memories and examine their accuracy. One key method for doing this is known as exposure by facing the source of our fear, either through visualization or real-world practice. The goal is to “erase the memory of Amalek” by confronting the doubts and neutralizing them.

A Matter of Perspective

In Parshat Zachor, we are told of the war with Amalek: “And it came to pass, when Moses held up his hand, that Israel prevailed; and when he let down his hand, Amalek prevailed...and Moses’ hands were heavy…and Aaron and Hur supported his hands…and his hands were steady until the going down of the sun.” (Exodus 17:11–12)

Let’s highlight three lessons:

1. As long as Moses kept his hands raised, Israel succeeded in battle.

2. It wasn’t easy- Moses needed support from others to keep his hands up.

3. His hands were “faith”- meaning he remained steadfast in his belief and trust in G-d until the light came.

We often think that “raising our hands” is a sign of giving up. But raising hands in this context symbolizes surrender to G-d which brings about victory.

Instead of saying, “I’m giving up,” when life gets hard- in parenting, work, or home management- we can say: “I raise my hands to G-d. I’ve done my best, and now I leave it in G-d’s hands. We do this by remembering to pray.

For Parshat Zachor: Three Things to Remember

1. Remember who leads the world.
Understand that everything that happens is for our good, even if we don’t see it yet. Like Moses, we need to raise our hands in prayer and ask G-d to help us see the light already present.

2. See through the disguise.
The Lubavitcher Rebbe was once asked: What can we learn from wearing costumes on Purim? He replied: Just as you wouldn’t get angry at someone in a clown or monster costume, you shouldn’t be upset with people who act harsh, rude, or cold. That’s not their true self- it’s just a “costume.” Deep inside, every Jew is full of purity and goodness. Your job is to gently remove the disguise and see their soul. That’s real Ahavat Yisrael (love for fellow Jews).

3. Remember the verses from Hallel:

• “I will thank You for afflicting me- for it led to my salvation.”
  → Be grateful for hardships. They often lead to growth and blessings.

• “This is from G-d- and it is wondrous in our eyes.”
  → Pray to recognize G-d’s hand in everything and see the wonder in it.

• “This is the day G-d made- let us rejoice and be glad in it.”
  → Stay present. Don’t fear the future or regret the past. Just be joyful — today.

CBT in Practice: Facing Fear through Exposure

Amalek is the spiritual force of doubt, fear, and hesitation. We all face situations that bring anxiety or dread. For some, riding the bus or using an elevator triggers intense fear. Naturally, people avoid what makes them anxious- they take the stairs or walk instead of riding public transportation.

But the goal in exposure therapy is to do the opposite and  deliberately encounter the feared situation. By doing so, we discover we’re capable of handling it. This is done gradually, with professional guidance, and only after learning how anxiety works: Is it dangerous? What are its pros and cons? What tools can help?

Once that foundation is set, we create a fear hierarchy which is a list of tasks that we want to accomplish, but are afraid of. Each is rated from 0 to 100 in fear level and arranged from least to most frightening. (We avoid anything truly dangerous.)

Building Courage, Step by Step

We begin with tasks in the 30–50 fear range. For instance, someone afraid of elevators might start with entering a glass elevator for just a moment- something they rate as a 40 on the fear scale. They do this daily for a week. Over time, the fear typically drops. This process is called habituation- we get used to the experience, and it no longer triggers the same reaction. The fear might drop from 40 to 20. The next week, we try a new task while continuing the previous one until it reaches a fear level of 0.

Gradually, step by step, we gain the confidence to face even more difficult fears, and reduce Amalek’s power over our inner world.