We Must Appreciate the Present, While Planning For the Future: The Sixth Article in the Series

It’s common for people experiencing low moods to be advised to write down five good things in their lives and to read the list each evening before bed, or when they wake up in the morning.

At first glance, this advice sounds positive, and can indeed help a person appreciate what they have in the present. And yet, this advice on its own can sometimes be harmful.

Why? Because a person’s sense of fulfillment is built on two levels:

1. A person should indeed appreciate what they already have.

2. A person must strive for more, aim to grow, gradually and wisely step outside their comfort zone, and break through their inner "glass ceiling."

A person who focuses only on amplifying the current positives in their life can train their mind to settle for less, to stop striving, and to remain stagnant. They may adopt a mindset rooted in past satisfaction instead of a drive toward future progress. In the short term, this approach may bring peace, calm, and improved mood, but over time, it may not bring lasting fulfillment. To feel ongoing satisfaction, a person must achieve and move forward.

Indeed, it's a great idea to write down five good things in your life. But at the same time, it is just as important to add five goals or milestones you want to achieve. By doing this, you can enjoy the fulfillment that comes from recognizing what you already have, while simultaneously continuing to grow and work toward goals that lie beyond your current reality.

A person who only focuses on what they already have will eventually sink into indifference, which often leads to regression. On the other hand, someone who focuses only on future aspirations may suffer from excessive stress and an inability to enjoy present experiences in peace.

As in many areas of life, balance is the key: the more we can balance appreciation for the present alongside aspiration for the future, we can live active, creative lives with peace of mind and serenity.

If we pay attention, we’ll notice this very balance reflected in our prayers. We begin with "Give thanks to the Lord for He is good"—gratitude for what we have. But we don’t stop there- immediately afterward is the Amidah prayer, in which we express our hopes and requests for a better future. We don’t settle for what exists, but strive and pray for something beyond our present limitations.

When we succeed in finding this balance, we learn to value what we have now, while also continuing to look for opportunities to grow, to become wiser, kinder, more virtuous, more efficient, more effective, and so on. We won’t get stuck in nostalgia, nor will we become obsessed with the future. Instead, we’ll value both sides of the coin equally, and use the strength we draw from each to fuel our personal growth and development.

How Can We Develop Courage?

Courage is a wonderful trait that can greatly support our personal progress and growth- how can we adopt this trait and add it to our personal toolbox?

A fascinating long-term study examined the connection between emotional expression and the traits of courage and self-confidence. In the study, thousands of teenagers were categorized as either emotionally expressive or non-expressive. Years later, the researchers examined their development and found that those labeled emotionally expressive grew into adults with greater confidence, courage, and the ability to overcome fears and insecurities.

The reasoning behind this is clear: people who are aware of their emotions are not afraid to confront them. This emotional awareness allows them to “take risks” and move forward without the fear of failure holding them back. An individual who doesn’t recognize or understand their emotions is likely to avoid experiences that may confront them with emotional challenges, thus preventing progress and personal breakthroughs.

Creativity is another powerful tool for developing courage. Creative individuals aren’t deterred by fear and aren’t easily restrained by it. Through creativity, they find ways to solve problems and look beyond temporary difficulties. The more we develop our creativity, the braver we become, and the more resistant we are to letting our fears block our personal growth.

From this moment we can adopt the trait of courage. Let’s believe in our ability to overcome fear, break free from the grip of the present, and strive with full force toward a better future. In doing so, we can grow and thrive, conquer new heights, and reach the goals we aspire to achieve.