If You Want to Move to the North - Move to the North!

For years, we had been thinking about moving to the north of the country. At the time, it seemed impossible. When you live in central Israel, anywhere more than an hour’s drive away feels distant, undeveloped, and strange. Still, we really loved the green hills of the Galilee, and I especially loved praying and learning at the tomb of Rabbi Shimon Bar Yochai. Eventually, we decided to give it a try—one year in the Galilee, a sort of trial period with a back door. We received encouragement from those around us, but still had our doubts.

One day, I stopped by a stationery store and told the shopkeeper about our plans. “The Galilee?” he said, his eyes lighting up. “That’s our dream too—to move to the Galilee. But now it’s no longer realistic.”

“Really?” I asked. “Why not?”

“Maybe twenty years ago, but now?” he replied. “We need to be close to medical services. And the grandkids…it’s just too late.”
I thanked him and headed home with a smile on my face—because earlier that same day, I had told my wife, ‘Maybe we should wait twenty years, until the kids are married, and then move north.’ It didn’t feel like a coincidence. The shopkeeper showed me clearly how important it is to wake up and act now, while we still can.
Want to move? Then move. There will always be excuses, and over time, they only grow stronger.

I had a whole list of excuses for why I shouldn’t do what I truly wanted and knew I needed to do—in this case, moving to the Galilee. What helped me during that interaction with the shopkeeper? It felt like I was meeting my “future missed-out self,” twenty years down the line.

I’m not saying he missed out—he’s living his life, and he seemed content. But for me, it was a mirror. I saw clearly that what I feared was actually the opposite of what I imagined. I thought I should wait twenty years, and here he was, unknowingly explaining to me why that would be a mistake.

There will always be excuses. But what price do we pay for abandoning our dreams? Instead of doing now what I believe I should be doing—what will energize me and help me bring my talents into the world—I’m caught up in excuses and imaginary futures. That certainly won’t move me forward.What can move me forward? Doing my best right now. Not giving in to excuses.

Moving to the north is just an example. Let’s look at our lives as a whole: Do I let excuses run my life, or do I live according to what I believe is right and meaningful?

Live your life the way you believe it should be lived. Don’t put on a performance for someone else. Firstly, because people can sense a performance—it’s rarely convincing. And secondly, because you have no idea how life will unfold down the road.

I have to live today according to what I believe in without excuses.
I’m not saying we shouldn’t adjust to our surroundings or make outward changes when needed. But we need to stay aware of what we’re actually going through, what’s really happening within us, and why we’re making the choices we make.

Sometimes, we try so hard to change ourselves—or to change others—to “fit in,” that we forget to pay attention to what the other person actually needs…or what we need. Like the joke about the man who said he was late because he was helping an elderly woman cross the street. “Why did it take so long?” they asked. He replied, “Because she resisted.”

Some may read this and say, “But I’ve consciously chosen to give up my career in order to raise my children—and I feel at peace with that.” That’s perfectly fine, even admirable—as long as it’s a conscious choice, with a clear understanding of both gains and sacrifices, and not something we blame on others or use to cast ourselves as victims of circumstance.

Every choice has a price. What's important is to be at peace with our choices—not to live as though we’re victims of fate. I choose my life. I choose my actions and my responses—both emotional and intellectual.

A few years before the story I shared at the beginning, my wife and I were driving back from Jerusalem to our home in the center of the country. Along the way, she asked me, “Tell me, if there were no limitations—how would your ideal daily life look?” “No limitations?” I asked. She smiled. I thought for a moment and said, “Honestly? I’d wake up really early—maybe five, even four in the morning—pray the sunrise prayer at Rabbi Shimon Bar Yochai’s tomb, spend time alone in the surrounding forests, then learn and work.” That was my dream.

I wasn’t fighting my current life, but I didn’t give up on that vision either. And sure enough, a few years later, the opportunity opened up—and we moved north. A year later, I found myself living exactly as I had once imagined.

Pay attention to what you ask for. And when things begin to move in that direction—make sure you’re not the one putting on the brakes, or falling back on excuses.

From Ran Weber’s new book, "Living the Day". To purchase, visit Hidabroot Shops or call: 073-222-125