The Power of Respect: How Honoring Others Elevates Your Own Dignity

Basic respect is a natural need for every person. As the highest being in creation, endowed with a divine soul, a human feels distress when humiliated in the eyes of others and relief when treated with honor. Therefore, our Sages instructed: “Let your fellow’s honor be as dear to you as your own.” The Hebrew word for “honor” (כבוד) shares a root with the word for “weight” (כבד), implying that you should view your friend as a person of significance and value- not as something light, dismissible, or worthless. As the Mishnah teaches: “Beloved is man, for he was created in the image [of G-d]; it is an even greater love that it was made known to him that he was created in the image.”

The person beside you, regardless of appearance, age, intelligence, speech, status, wealth, family background, or skin color, is the crown of creation. He was created in the image of G-d and, as such, must be honored.

Honor and Self-Worth

One who trains himself to be sensitive to others and careful with their dignity becomes honorable himself. As the Mishnah says, “Who is honored? One who honors others.” On a simple level, this means that such a person becomes respected by others. But on a deeper level, honoring others reflects a refined, dignified inner self. One who fails to respect others proves his own lack of awareness of the greatness of the human being.

Often, people struggle to honor others because they feel superior in some way, due to wealth, wisdom, physical strength, etc. However, your friend was also created in the image of G-d, and for every advantage you have, your friend has a different one. In fact, if you misuse your gifts, you may be morally lower than your friend. As the Pele Yoetz writes: “If someone is wiser than me, I honor him for his wisdom. If I am wiser, then he is more righteous than me- for I sin knowingly while he sins unknowingly. If he is wealthy, I honor him for that. If I am wealthy, I must honor him even more, for I may not be giving charity properly, while he is innocent.”

Similarly, the Ramban famously advised his son: “Every person should be greater in your eyes than you. If he is wise or wealthy, honor him. If he is poor or less learned, say to yourself: I am more guilty than he. For if he sins, it is from ignorance. If I sin, it is deliberate.”

The Pele Yoetz adds: “It is wrong to honor the rich while degrading the poor. G-d will defend their dignity and take up their cause. A rich person who smiles and speaks kindly to the poor fulfills a great mitzvah, for he revives their hearts and lifts their spirits- especially if they are relatives.”

Everyone Has Their Time

The Mishnah says, “Do not disdain any person, for there is no person who does not have his moment.” Maimonides explains: even someone simple may one day rise in status or ability, and you may need him. G-d, in His Providence, often arranges that one who once seemed beneath you will rise, giving you a chance to learn humility and honor all people.

Respecting Students and Children

An essential part of honoring others is honoring one’s students or children. A teacher or parent must correct misbehavior, but never through humiliation. Rebuke must be offered with respect- not through name-calling or degrading gestures. The Sages say: “Let your student’s honor be as dear to you as your own.” A teacher must understand the emotional sensitivity of each child, even in a group setting, and treat every individual with dignity. If a teacher cannot do this, they should not teach.

Respect, Not Naivety

To be clear, honoring someone does not mean blind trust. Our Sages say: “Assume everyone is like a thief- but honor them like Rabban Gamliel.” Be cautious while still showing respect. The Talmud recounts that Rabbi Yehoshua once hosted a guest and removed the ladder to the attic after the guest went to sleep. In the night, the guest tried to steal valuables and fell. Rabbi Yehoshua said, “Fool! Didn’t you realize we were already cautious of you?”

Balance Brings Peace

True social wisdom lies in balancing deep respect for others with appropriate caution. Such a person lives peacefully, safely, and in harmony with themselves and society.