Living in a Happy World - Part I

When we ask, Where is the happy life?, no one seems to answer. Only the silent echo of human experience responds: There is no such thing as a happy life.

Scripture tells us: “The world is built with kindness” (Psalms 89:3). If G-d is good, and if He is the source of all goodness, then where is the happiness He created for the people of this world? On the one hand, it’s clear the world is full of suffering. On the other, it’s equally clear that this suffering is not necessary, and the gates of happiness can be opened.

To begin answering this existential question, we must first shift our focus inward. We need to look into the depths of the soul, not just at the surface level dictated by feelings and impulses.

An Example: The Cat and the Milk

Picture this: a cat stands facing a bowl of milk, craving it intensely. But next to the bowl stands a man holding a stick. The cat neither moves forward nor retreats. It stays frozen.

Is the cat weighing the pros and cons- philosophizing?
Option A: Enjoy the milk, but suffer a painful hit.
Option B: Skip the milk and avoid the pain.
A tough call, no?

No. The cat isn’t a philosopher, it’s just a cat.

What’s really happening is that two natural instincts are at war: the desire for milk and the fear of the stick. Whichever is stronger in that moment determines the cat’s action. It operates on instinct, nothing more.

Humans: The Power of Free Will

Unlike animals, we are blessed with free will and intellect. We’re capable of choosing how to act based on thoughtful consideration.

The reason happiness is often missing from our lives is not due to G-d’s design. As the Mishnah says in Pirkei Avot: “Jealousy, lust, and the pursuit of honor remove a person from the world.” (Avot 4:21)

G-d created a world full of happiness. But through our own choices, we exile ourselves from it. We willingly enter a world of suffering by giving control of our hearts over to the three destructive forces of jealousy, desire and honor. These are what the sages refer to as “corrupted traits” or “flawed middot.”

Happiness Is Within Reach- But There’s a Condition

A happy life is possible, but only if we cleanse our hearts of these three damaging traits. Why?

These inner forces push us into impulsive decisions, inner chaos, tension, arguments, relentless competition, sadness, irritability, confusion, and hasty mistakes. They damage not only our relationships, but even our mental and physical health. They ultimately remove us from the world. Even the joy we think we’ve achieved becomes bitter in the end because of these inner saboteurs.

A River, a Dam, and the Soul

Imagine a peaceful river. It flows calmly, its waters pure, capable of carrying large ships, bringing blessing to all nearby.

But if you block that river,  disaster strikes. It overflows, crashes through barriers, floods towns, overturns ships. The same calm waters become a devastating force of destruction.

The same is true of the human heart. As long as we control our desires with our mind, our internal “river” flows peacefully. When we place “dams” of jealousy, lust, and ego in our hearts, we are overtaken by chaos.

Unfortunately, we all know people- or see parts of ourselves- who have fallen into this trap.

Where Is Happiness?

We return to our opening question: Is happiness really possible?

Yes, and it's closer than you think. The key has already been handed to us: “And G-d took the man and placed him in the Garden of Eden, to work it and to guard it.” (Genesis 2:15)

This is the secret. G-d gave us a garden, and told us to work it (to develop ourselves) and to guard it (to protect what matters). All we need is the willingness to step in, with prayer to the Creator that we may truly succeed.

Rabbi Gideon Shachar is a teacher at the "Netivot Olam" yeshiva for returnees to Judaism, Bnei Brak