The Path to True Greatness: Cultivating Humility in Thought and Action

Humility is like the trunk of a tree that supports and nourishes all the branches of good character. A humble person naturally and quickly develops positive traits such as kindness, gentleness, compassion, and sensitivity to others. At the same time, humility makes it easier to overcome negative emotions like anger, jealousy, hatred, and the desire for honor or indulgence.

By contrast, a person who sees themselves as superior to others often falls into the trap of arrogance. About such arrogance, it says, “Every haughty heart is an abomination to G-d.” This person tends to be easily offended, quick to anger, constantly craving honor, and often driven by selfish desires, even at the expense of others. In their mind, they are above everyone else and they feel entitled to everything. How dare someone speak to them without the “proper respect”?

A person like this isn’t well-liked, as our sages say in the Talmud: “One who is arrogant is not accepted even by those in his own household.”

A humble person however is beloved by all who know them. Humility signals openness, warmth, and a willingness to listen, and it invites connection. Beyond all that, Heaven grants special favor to the humble, as it says: “G-d gives grace to the humble.”

The Two Paths to Cultivating Humility

One who wishes to truly develop humility must work along two paths:

1. The Thoughtful Path: Recognizing that humility begins in the mind and shapes the heart. Humility is rooted in truth, while arrogance is built on illusion.

Pride often stems from two false beliefs:

• I am perfect, lacking nothing.

• The strengths and talents I have are entirely my own doing.

The first step to real humility is to seek truth. Be honest with yourself. Recognize that no one is without flaws. A person might be wealthy, but lack wisdom, or be wise but struggle with anger. Only G-d is truly perfect.

Even the talents and blessings we do have such as intelligence, health, and wealth, are not really “ours" but gifts from G-d. If everything we have is a Divine gift, there is no place for arrogrance.

The Mesillat Yesharim (Path of the Just) offers a parable:
An eagle may soar effortlessly to the top of a tree or an ox may pull immense weight with its strength. Should either boast? Each is simply doing what it was built to do. Likewise, even if a person has great wisdom, it is only natural for them to use the mind G-d gave them.

When we feel joy over our strengths, we should redirect that feeling into gratitude and to recognize the kindness of the One who gave us those gifts.

Humility, then, does not mean denying your value, but knowing your worth without inflating yourself above others. It brings a peaceful, gentle inner spirit that honors both yourself and those around you.

When arrogance begins to creep in, recall the powerful words of Akavia ben Mehalalel: “Know from where you came, where you are going, and before whom you will give account. From where did you come? From a putrid drop. Where are you going? To dust and worms. And before whom will you stand in judgment? Before the King of kings, the Holy One, Blessed be He.”

Many great sages would silently repeat such verses to themselves whenever they received praise or honor, to stay grounded and avoid even the slightest rise of arrogance in their hearts.

2. The Practical Path: Forming habits and behaviors that help internalize this mindset.

The Mesillat Yesharim outlines four practical areas to practice humility:

• In everyday behavior – How you speak, walk, sit, and carry yourself.

• In bearing insult – Choosing silence and patience over reaction.

• In avoiding power and titles – Resisting the urge for status and recognition.

• In fleeing honor – Allowing honor to follow you rather than chasing after it.

Speech:
Speak gently and respectfully. As the sages said: “Let a person always speak softly with others.” Words should uplift- not shame.

Posture and movement:
Walk modestly, without arrogance or showiness. Don’t carry yourself with exaggerated pride.

Seating and social presence:
Choose modest places. Sit among the humble, not the elite. As the verse says: “Do not exalt yourself in the king’s presence… better to be told, ‘Come up here,’ than to be humiliated.”

Accepting insults:
True strength lies in letting go of offense. As the sages taught: “Who does G-d forgive? One who forgives others.” And: “Those who are insulted but do not insult back…are like the rising sun in its strength.”

Avoiding positions of authority:
“One who chases after honor, honor runs from them.” Leadership, when accepted, should be seen not as a prize but as a responsibility. As Rabban Gamliel said, “Do you think I’m giving you power? I’m giving you servitude.”

Training and Reflection: The Two Keys

Humility is developed through habit and reflection. Form humble behaviors such as sitting in the back, wearing modest clothing, or not insisting on recognition. In time, humility becomes part of who you are. Reflect deeply on your flaws, the nature of human life and the uncertainty of wealth, status, or strength- all of which can disappear.

If You Struggle, Don’t Give Up

It’s normal to fall. As it says: “The righteous fall seven times- and rise again.” Like a child learning to walk, we often fall before we gain steady footing. Each fall is part of the learning. Don’t despair. Keep reflecting on the damage arrogance causes. It clouds judgment, leads to poor decisions, and invites downfall, as it says: “Pride goes before destruction.” When arrogance rises, wisdom often leaves.

The humble are uplifted by people and by Heaven. As it says: “Before honor comes humility.”

Even in times of Divine judgment, humility can protect a person:
“Seek justice, seek humility- perhaps you will be sheltered on the day of G-d’s wrath.”

And finally, our sages promise: “One who comes to purify themselves is helped from above.”

Humility is not weakness. It is a quiet strength, a light in the soul, and a path to greatness.