A Father's Journey with His Autistic Son: Discovering Faith and Community

Rimon Tobin posted this week, following the tragedy in Meron, about the divine providence regarding his son Yuval, who is on the autism spectrum:

"On Thursday, I was supposed to accompany Yuval to Meron. Naturally, I was full of worries — even under normal circumstances, a large celebration is not a place for a child with autism. At the last minute, Yuval decided to change plans and went to study all night at Rabbi Ginsburgh's house, a central figure in Chabad. I drove him to Kfar Chabad and returned once I saw he was in good hands. Then, in the middle of the night, the news started to flow in, and I called Yuval just to make sure everything was okay. When he answered and said, 'Yes, Dad, I'm fine,' I couldn't help but thank the One who watches over us from above: thank you for not putting me through the ordeal of worrying about your son in the middle of a mass disaster. Somehow, his heart guided him in the right direction.

For two years now, Yuval has been drawing closer to religion, and we are discovering the religious world through him. I was born to secular parents and grew up on a kibbutz as an atheist, without loving feelings towards religious people. Thanks to Yuval, I can see that things are not black and white as I thought. I have believed for 10 years, and one sentence I heard guides me in particular: 'This world is the playground of the soul.'

Sometimes, in difficult moments, I imagine it's just a simulation testing me, and I manage to detach myself a moment from the burning emotions that prevent me from thinking logically. And of course, you can doubt everything, but not the soul—if it chose to be here, it must have a reason. Yuval did not connect to religion for nothing.

Because it's not just the ideas—it's mainly the people. Somehow, in the religious community, he finds a lot of acceptance and empathy for his condition, without judgment. People look him in the eye and even see him as a high soul (I'm sure he is but who am I to say), they provide him with a loving space, and they manage to be patient with him. These people have made our last two years much more pleasant, with the feeling that Yuval found what interests him and many friends who listen to him.

Due to my acquaintance with religion from this angle, it is much harder for me to see the religious divide in the nation. Yuval tells me that in Judaism, there is a lot of connection to time—between current events, the weekly Torah portion, the seasons, and the holidays. Therefore, I was surprised to hear that on the 33rd day of the Omer, with the rabbi, they learned about the dispute of Korach and his congregation—a dispute about leadership. Even there, many families met death due to bad advice and ego.

In such times, I can only hope we manage to find compassion and set aside ego and disagreements, and that we will promote only disputes meant to advance us as a society. That we will know how to embrace the other not just as a slogan and when it suits us, but also when it's complex, when the other is completely different and requires special attention and has customs we don’t even understand. Because there lies the real challenge."