Why Were the Matriarchs Barren? The Hidden Power of Prayer and Suffering in Jewish Faith

The Talmudic Sages say: Why were the Matriarchs barren? Because the Holy One, blessed be He, longs for the prayers of the righteous.

It was worthwhile for God to cause the Matriarchs pain — even though they had committed no sin or wrongdoing, simply because He desired their prayers. Of course, this is ultimately for the benefit of the person praying.

What we think is "better" may not be so in God's eyes. To us, it may seem obvious that it is far better to have children sitting around your table. But the Holy One, blessed be He, may say: It is more important to Me that you sit in your home without a soul, just so that you will lift your eyes to Me. This sorrow and anguish will cause you to cling to Me with a broken heart, with faith and acceptance of suffering with joy. And that is the greatest delight I receive from you.

This couple must consider how many more opportunities they now have to do acts of kindness and charity, which are often not possible for those busy raising children.

They can also reflect on the words of Chovot HaLevavot (Duties of the Heart), which teaches us to always look at the positive side of suffering.

The Path of Emunah (Faith) for Those Who Have Not Yet Been Blessed

This challenge allows a person to consider the hardship endured by those who have been blessed with children, including constant worries, emotional pain, tension, endless concerns about their health and safety, the burden of livelihood day and night, to raise them, support them, clothe them, provide for their needs, and ultimately, to marry them off. Until the end of one’s life, a person is consumed by worries over their children.

A person should always rejoice in their current state. As Chovot HaLevavot concludes in Sha'ar HaBitachon (Gate of Trust), quoting a wise man: "Never have I risen from my bed wishing to be in a different state than the one I was in."

A Story of Our Mother Rachel's Yahrzeit (Anniversary of Passing)

On the traditional yahrzeit night of Rachel Imeinu — the 11th of Cheshvan, Rabbi Chaim Shmuelevitz came to pray at her grave. As he stood there, he heard, from the other side of the room, the voice of a woman pleading tearfully:

"Mother Rachel! You yourself tasted this bitter pain of being childless — God have mercy! So please, mother, plead on my behalf, that I too may be remembered with children who will live and endure..."

Upon hearing her heartfelt prayer, Rabbi Chaim was deeply moved. He immediately said: "I am confident that this prayer has been accepted in Heaven. And next year, I wish to be the sandek (godfather) at this child’s brit milah."

He made efforts to find out who this woman was, and the following year, Rabbi Chaim Shmuelevitz served as sandek at the brit of her newborn son.

(From Sefer HaZikaron – The Book of Remembrance)