Your True Worth Is How God Sees You: A Torah Perspective on Self-Worth and Identity

We live in a world of illusion and a world obsessed with appearances. In today’s culture, the tall, attractive, charismatic person is often seen as important, admired, and socially esteemed. This is the deception of our times.

A person’s worth is not defined by what others think of them, but by the way God sees them.

We see this clearly in the story of Samuel the Prophet, when he was sent by God to anoint one of Yishai's sons as the next king. Upon seeing Eliav, David’s older brother, Samuel assumed he must be the chosen one. But God immediately corrected him: “Do not look at his appearance or at his height, for I have rejected him. For man sees with his eyes, but God sees into the heart.” (Samuel I, 16:7)

If a person lives with this perspective, sadness will not take root in their heart. In this world, we are conditioned to measure ourselves against the strong, the wealthy, the successful, but in truth, who is more powerful and meaningful to our lives, than our Creator Himself?

If so, your only true calculation should be: How beloved and worthy am I in God’s eyes? Instead of: How admired am I by other human beings, who are fragile, limited, and unable to help me in times of distress, illness, or poverty.

How Should We View Physical Imperfection or Unattractiveness?

Ask yourself: What truly defines your worth before God? God does not measure a person by their beauty, appearance, physical wholeness or disability. These are not His criteria.

God’s “gaze” is on the heart, on the purity of your intentions, the goodness of your deeds, the beauty of your soul. Physical form is irrelevant to Him. In fact, your circumstances may actually be an opportunity to direct your actions solely toward winning favor in God’s eyes, without distractions or ulterior motives.

How much easier it becomes to connect with your Creator, when you don’t conform to the superficiality of this false world! When the gates of this "world of lies" are closed to you, the gates of the world of truth stand wide open.

Hidden Gifts in Hardships

Take a moment to reflect: To what degree are you protected from arrogance and ego — the pitfalls that often trap those who are physically attractive or successful?

The evil inclination is especially powerful over such people, drawing them into pride and temptation. As Rashi famously comments (Taanit 7): “It is difficult for the handsome to lower their pride.”

You, however, may be blessed with a greater gift: “A broken and humble heart — God will not despise.” (Psalms 51:19)

To constantly remain desirable before God is the greatest joy. After all, “Charm is deceptive and beauty is vain; but a person who acts with integrity — that’s what truly matters.” It is our deeds that draw people near or push them away, not our appearance.

From the Letters of the Chazon Ish: “All my days I have been broken and crushed, never having tasted any pleasure from worldly delights. In addition to constant physical pain and weakness, my only joy has been in doing the will of my Creator. And my deepest sorrow is when I stumble into sin.” (Chazon Ish, Letter 153)

If you’ve been given hardship, limitation, or rejection by the world, remember this: The gate of falsehood may be closed to you, but the gate of truth has opened wide. In God’s world, it is not your body, but your soul and your actions that define your greatness.