"No Prayer Goes to Waste" and Other Stirring Answers from Rabbi Kanievsky

In the book 'Kol Mishalotecha,' one of Rabbi Chaim Kanievsky's students recounts how he approached the Rabbi to share that he was invited to speak at a conference organized by a group assisting families hoping for children. "What should I say to these families facing challenges?" he asked the Rabbi.

Rabbi Kanievsky replied with the following advice: "First, tell them that prayers are never lost. No prayer is lost, and if it doesn't help now, it will help later. If not for them, then for others. And if it doesn't help with one thing, it will help with another."

Rabbi Kanievsky added: "A blessing is effective if the recipient believes in its power. Also, tell them that a woman should not go within four cubits of a grave in a cemetery."

The questioner continued, asking the Rabbi which mitzvah couples should strengthen to have enduring offspring. Rabbi Kanievsky opened the Mishnah Berurah and showed him the words of the Chafetz Chaim, stating that by enhancing the observance of Shabbat, one merits children who are great among Israel. Rabbi Kanievsky further noted that this is also a spiritual remedy for the essence of having children. This is how to observe Shabbat.

Rabbi Kanievsky was also asked, "When praying for a couple, should the names of both partners be mentioned? Why?" The Rabbi replied: "It's possible that the wife has merit, but the husband does not, and thus he is the obstacle, and it can also be the reverse. Therefore, pray for both."

When Rabbi Kanievsky was asked whether it's appropriate to travel to the village of Shunem to pray at the grave of the Shunammite woman, he responded that the book 'Kaftor VaFerach' provides signs indicating that the place of the miracle with the Shunammite woman was where the village of Shunem is today. Rabbi Kanievsky mentioned that he told his father, the Stipler, who replied that if that's the location, since a righteous person prayed there for children, it's a worthy place to pray for offspring, even though the house has been destroyed. He added, "We traveled there with 10 people who didn't have children, and all were blessed." He further noted: "If security is provided, it's permitted to travel there."

When asked, "Who should travel – the husbands or the wives?" Rabbi Kanievsky replied: "It makes no difference." He also mentioned: "I've heard of cases where it helped some, but not everyone."

"Which prayer should be said there?" Rabbi Kanievsky answered: "Psalms 102 and 103 are suitable for praying for offspring."

"Is it necessary to travel with a quorum of people?" Rabbi Kanievsky replied: "A quorum is only needed if you wish to say Kaddish. For prayer, a quorum is not required."

More on Rabbi Kanievsky:

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Rabbi Kanievsky's Surprising Response to a Scholar Still Childless

Rabbi Kanievsky Astonished the Inquirer: "Perhaps the Couple Was Blessed with Twins Because of You"