Should We Show Gratitude to the Wicked?

In the previous article, we discussed showing gratitude toward the Egyptians and the difference between Amalek and other nations. But is there truly a need to express thanks to the Egyptians or other nations that have harmed us? Click here.

Uriah asks:

"In Tractate Shabbat (33b), there is the story of Rabbi Shimon bar Yochai, Rabbi Yehuda, and Rabbi Yose. Rabbi Yehuda praised the Romans who indirectly benefited the Israelites by building roads, bridges, and baths, while Rabbi Yose remained silent, and Rabbi Shimon bar Yochai condemned the Romans, stating that everything they did was for themselves, and additionally, they increased immorality and imposed taxes on Israel. Now I understand that both are words of the living Hashem, representing approaches in serving Hashem, and thus I ask if according to Rabbi Yehuda's words, there is no reason nowadays to acknowledge the nations of the world, who, despite disliking us, have invented technological innovations that serve us? Along the same line, perhaps there is also a reason to express gratitude towards the wicked of Israel who, although their intent was to lead us astray, still served Israel in other ways."

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Hello, Uriah, and thank you for your question.

This is a very deep issue, and indeed it deals with different ways of serving Hashem.

There are two ways of Hashem in our world - the attribute of justice and the attribute of mercy, and they are essentially two approaches in serving Hashem.

Expressing gratitude even to those who have harmed us is an attribute of piety and mercy. A famous example of gratitude: Moses did not strike the Nile, and he let his brother Aaron perform the plague of blood with his staff (Exodus 7:19), and Rashi explains: "Say to Aaron - because the Nile protected Moses when he was cast into it, therefore, it was not smitten by him, neither with blood nor with frogs, but it was smitten by Aaron."

Even though Israelite infants were killed in the Nile, Moses, in his great righteousness, felt an obligation of gratitude for his personal salvation in the Nile.

The Torah forbids us from despising the Egyptians because they initially hosted our forefathers kindly in Egypt (Deuteronomy 23:8).

From a plain standpoint of justice, there should not have been room to find merit for the Egyptians or the Romans, for all they did, they did for themselves, and they added to the oppression of Israel a hundred times more than they benefited.

But from the perspective of mercy, we can see them all as messengers of Hashem for our benefit, serving the purpose of creation either directly or indirectly. Then there is room to find merit even for those messengers who did not intend to benefit us if some good was caused by their actions.

Unlike the previous examples, we can find an expression of this learning of merit among the righteous, from what Joseph told his brothers who thought to kill him: "Joseph said to them, 'Do not fear, for am I in the place of Hashem? As for you, you meant evil against me, but Hashem meant it for good, to bring it about as it is this day, to save many people alive'" (Genesis 50:19).

This is the handling of the attribute of mercy, which expresses a lofty kindness of gratitude that did not come to a person based solely on his intention. In this way, the righteous can connect to the attribute of mercy of Hashem.

The Talmud tells us that Hashem had mercy even on the Egyptians who pursued Israel and drowned in the Red Sea: "At that moment the ministering angels wanted to sing a song before the Holy One, blessed be He. But the Holy One, blessed be He, said to them: ‘The work of My hands is drowning in the sea, and you want to sing a song before Me?!’" (Sanhedrin 39b).

Yet counter to the attribute of mercy, there is also the attribute of justice of Hashem, whose foundation is the truth - a truth that cannot be escaped because even when Hashem is patient and merciful to His creatures, ultimately, there is reward and punishment in the world. Let us not forget that the wicked Egyptians paid a heavy price for their wickedness, received their punishments in the Ten Plagues, measure for measure, and those who chased Israel drowned in the Red Sea.

The sages said: "Anyone who says Hashem is lenient - let his life be lenient for him" (Baba Kamma 50a).

Hashem is merciful, so He lightens judgments and does not punish immediately, but He will not forgo justice, for "the seal of Hashem is truth" (Shabbat 55a).

Therefore, there are primarily two ways to view the world: according to the attribute of justice (truth) and according to the attribute of mercy (kindness).

Rabbi Shimon bar Yochai achieved a very high level of holiness and acted according to the attribute of justice (truth and fairness). Because of this, he was able to reveal higher secrets. However, this world cannot sustain itself through this measure alone. It is told that upon leaving the cave, he destroyed a field because he saw the people working there idling away from engaging in Torah, so a heavenly voice instructed him to return to the cave for another year (Shabbat 33b).

With the coming of the redemption, souls will rise from their low spiritual status, and then justice will be revealed in the world. The Midrash tells that at the end of days, nations will claim that because of them, the Israelites merited their redemption. But Hashem will examine their hearts to prove their true intent (Tractate Avodah Zarah 3). To do this, Hashem will give the nations one commandment - sitting in a sukkah, but will cause intense heat, forcing them to leave the sukkah, and in their anger, the nations will kick the sukkah and return to their air-conditioned homes. The Talmud asks, since the law states that one who suffers is exempt from the sukkah, and even a Jew is not required to remain in it if distressed by heat or cold, why would Hashem hold the nations to a stricter standard than the Jews? The Talmud answers that the commandment of the sukkah will be given to the nations only to test their departure from the sukkah. A Jew who cannot fulfill the commandment does so with regret and disappointment because he truly wanted to fulfill his Creator’s will to dwell in a sukkah, whereas the non-Jew would kick the sukkah in anger, wanting only the reward of the commandment.

This demonstrates the attribute of truth, as it will be practiced with the coming of complete redemption, and our return to holiness as in the days of the first man in the Garden of Eden.

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However, in response to your last question, you should know that gratitude is not expressed in every situation. We are not required to show gratitude to those who try to bring us down spiritually and distance us from Hashem. In the Midrash Sifrei (117) it is stated:

"Rabbi Shimon says, the Egyptians drowned Israel in the sea, and the Edomites met Israel with the sword, yet the Torah did not prohibit them [from converting] except up to the third generation. But the Ammonites and Moabites who devised a plan to lead Israel astray, are forever prohibited [from converting]. To teach you that someone who leads a person into sin is worse than someone who kills him. Because the killer only removes him from this world, while the one who leads him into sin removes him from both this world and the World to Come!"

Mercy is admirable only when it does not come at the expense of truth. Someone who causes another to sin not only inflicts temporary external harm but causes eternal loss, damaging the purpose of creation, and in such a case, there is no longer a place for finding merit.

Aside from the simple fact that those with corrupted morals may turn their beneficial inventions and discoveries into tools for destroying the generation.

Rabbi Eliyahu Dessler z"l was a great figure in ethics and philosophy. He explained that although science and technology are neither inherently good nor bad, because their creators are of corrupted morals, they have the power to destroy the world:

"In their arrogance, people think that expanding this world and increasing sciences and inventions will build them a perfect world - but it is a great mistake. All their improvements are really corruptions. As civilization progresses, so does destruction. They do not want to understand that bad morals ruin everything. If people were 'givers,' then at the very least the world would be perfect, but the problem is that they are 'takers,' grabbing, arguing, and fighting, making all their inventions tools of destruction. For example, reducing distances through travel and flying machinery, we can see how destructive they are; whereas once wars destroyed only locally, now it is worldwide devastation. And this is the human mistake of thinking that correcting morals will happen by itself, foolishness, not even the fool of fools should fall into this, only when King Messiah comes and the whole earth is filled with the knowledge of Hashem as the waters cover the sea, and people become givers, then, and only then, will this world be corrected..." (Michtav M’Eliyahu, Volume 1, page 70).

If people’s hearts were corrected and they truly wanted to do good and give, there wouldn't be impoverished nations in the technological world we live in. Everyone would be educated and there would be no hungry children. But instead, what happens in our world is that states act out of selfish motives - both internally and externally.

Internally, in the high cost of living and the creation of poverty among the population despite the country’s abundant resources, people are hungry, homeless, or fall under medical burdens; and externally, when developed nations severely harm the environment and public health, seas are polluted and the ozone is damaged, massive amounts of toxins are dumped into the sea and air without consideration, and this is also reflected in their treatment of other people - such as exploiting workers in poor countries like Africa and China who live as slaves, and for destructive political wars for oil and other resources.

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Nevertheless, regardless of the deep spiritual discussion on the purpose of creation and the ways to view it, we must acknowledge an important educational foundation in serving Hashem, and know that every measure Hashem gave us can be used for good or for bad.

The Torah does not wish us to praise gentiles so that we will not want to resemble them. The great measure of Israel is found in the fact that "Indeed, it is a people that dwells alone, and is not reckoned among the nations" (Numbers 23:9). If the children of Israel consider the nations, they will be influenced by their actions.

The Torah says "do not show favor to them" (Deuteronomy 7:2), and one of the things our sages taught from this verse is that we should not give grace to idol worshippers or say "how handsome is this idol worshipper," but only if the intent is to praise Hashem for giving wisdom to humankind.

And this is the ruling in Jewish law in the Shulchan Aruch (Yoreh De'ah, Siman 151, 14): "It is forbidden to praise them, even to say 'how handsome is this idol worshipper in appearance.' All the more so to praise their deeds, or to cherish any of their words. However, if one's intent in praising them is to acknowledge Hashem for creating such a beautiful creature - it is permitted."

However, there are decisors who believed that these matters were specifically said about idol-worshipping gentiles (Tzitz Eliezer 15, Siman 47, 5).

In these words, there is a significant foundation in Jewish education. Even when showing mercy to sinners, we must be cautious not to give grace and respect to people whose actions are improper.

There is a great spiritual danger in empathy for evil-doers, as one who shows excessive mercy towards sinners and wicked people may come to identify with them, inevitably respecting them, and then also embracing their evil deeds.

There is no doubt that the attribute of mercy can find light even within the greatest darkness and describe even perversions as a descent for the sake of an ascent. We can always praise Hashem for giving His wisdom to humankind, which benefits us. The problem is that too often in our generation, the desire for "gratitude" originates from a negative place of wanting to resemble the nations. And it is known that one who values materialism too much will eventually cling to it. Therefore, I think that regardless of the deep subject of the attribute of justice and the attribute of mercy, there is a correct practice in education and perspective to distance our thoughts from the wicked.