Rabbi Yigal Cohen - What is Pride and Why Should We Avoid It?

"Pride" - Its meaning is the feeling of superiority over others.

This can manifest towards your wife or husband, neighbors or relatives, coworkers, or in the kollel, towards people not as observant or wealthy as you, less attractive, or less intelligent.

In short, the proud person is always searching for what makes them better than others, focusing on where others perform worse.

The solution is found in the words of the Ramban mentioned above. For instance, if we see a person who is less wise than us, we should understand that perhaps in Hashem's eyes, this person is more righteous than we are, and even greater in wisdom because the Creator blessed be He has given them a limited intellect which they utilize fully, making a complete effort to learn and understand with all their might. Thus, they are completely righteous and wise. In contrast, we who received greater intelligence from the Creator do not even exploit half of our abilities and are therefore considered inferior in His eyes.

The Gemara in Pesachim 50 and Bava Batra 10 tells the story of Rav Yosef, the son of Rabbi Yehoshua ben Levi, who passed away and then returned to life (what is now called a near-death experience). When his father asked him, "What did you see above?" he answered, "I saw an upside-down world; the upper ones below, and the lower ones above." To which his father replied, "You saw a clear world."

The commentators of the Gemara (Tosafot) explain that Rav Yosef saw, in the World of Truth, people highly renowned for their wisdom, wealth, and deeds in this world situated low, while those perceived as simple in this world were placed high, closer to the Creator.

This Gemara imparts a powerful moral; sometimes we disdain simple people not particularly wise or exceptionally righteous, yet in the World to Come, they are significantly more esteemed than we are.

The Gemara in Taanit 28 also recounts how they asked Elijah the Prophet, "Who among the people in the market are destined for the World to Come?" Elijah answered, "These two comedians who bring joy to people." Despite not being Torah scholars, they gladden people and merit the World to Come.

This Gemara teaches us two vital points. Firstly, how highly Hashem values joy, for because they brought joy to others, they earned the World to Come. Secondly, we can't truly measure who is esteemed in God's eyes. The funny fellow next to us in the kollel might not be a great genius, but in the World of Truth, he is considered more significant.

Proper Perspective

In the book "Michtav MeEliyahu" (Part 1, p. 111), there is a wonderful explanation on how to view those who seem less observant than us in Torah and mitzvot. Consider a hungry avrech who sees pork for sale but refrains from eating it. Surely, he earns a reward from the Creator, but his reward isn't particularly great as it wasn't hard to make the correct choice.

However, a Jew raised in a non-observant home who refrains from going to the beach on Shabbat surely earns many times more because their choice was much harder.

Likewise, a woman brought up in a strictly observant household who dresses modestly and covers her head according to the law might compare herself in prayer to a woman in modern attire. Her reward could be far greater because she came from a house where immodest attire was the norm, yet she made a tremendous effort to come to pray and dressed in her "most modest" clothes. Her trial to choose modesty was much more challenging, creating immense satisfaction before the Creator.

A wonderful story appears in the Talmud Yerushalmi (Taanit 1:4) illustrating the value of a simple Jew. During a drought, it was revealed to the sages in a dream that rain would come if a certain Jew, a donkey driver, would pray.

The sages asked him, "What do you do?"

He replied, "I am a donkey driver!"

They inquired if he had done any special deeds.

The Jew answered, "Here is what happened: A woman once asked me to rent a donkey. She began to weep bitterly on the journey. When I asked why, she told of her husband held captive by bandits demanding a ransom. She was on her way to sell herself to pay it. My heart was moved to pity, so I sold the donkey and gave her the money to free her husband."

The sages told him, "You are worthy to pray for rain!"

He did, and the skies opened, bringing rain.

Many sages of that generation engaged in redeeming captives, prayed for rain and were not answered because their trials weren't as great. The impactful act of that donkey driver in overcoming his urge created a much greater impression in Heaven, resulting in immediate rainfall.

If we try to compare our wisdom and deeds with those of the Tanaim and Amoraim, we can't even grasp the extent of their greatness and sanctity, where even the least among them could revive the dead.

Indeed, Rabbi Chaim Vital cites Rabbi Isaac Luria in "Shaar HaGilgulim" (Jerusalem 1868, 62b) affirming that a minor deed in our degraded generation holds a much higher value than a major act in the time of the Tanaim. This is because our souls are much lower, and our challenges, such as the internet and its ilk, are far more intense. If in our days a Jew overcomes and doesn't wander into open internet, his act is greater than during the Tanaim’s era.

For you men,

If you have a neighbor behaving poorly, know that the Creator might have endowed him with severe challenges of mental and behavioral disorders, making it hard for him to reach your level. You haven't yet exerted all your potential, so even if you behave better, it’s not proof you’re better in Hashem's eyes. True humility means not feeling superior to him.

Similarly, if you see a simple laborer barely setting time for Torah, unable to grasp Talmud and posekim, while you’ve been blessed to study extensively and keep mitzvot meticulously, it doesn't mean you're better than him. He was given fewer abilities by the Creator, so his small deed, like studying an hour a day even if he doesn’t fully grasp it, is considered immense before Hashem. In contrast, your eight-hour Torah day might not have maximized your potential, as you could study more. Hashem measures by effort and struggle, not hours studied.

The book "Yagel Libi BeYeshuatecha" is available at leading stores and at Hadaarot Shops