The Unconditional Love of God: Understanding Divine Love Beyond Human Emotions

Hello Rabbi, I am 24 years old and have been living abroad for the past two and a half years. For some time now I’ve been strengthening my connection to Judaism, and I have even begun keeping Shabbat.

I have a question that troubles me deeply and causes me a lot of discomfort, and I hope you can help me. From what I understand, God loves us no matter what with an unconditional love, and according to our actions, we can influence the flow of abundance/light we receive from Him.

My relationship with God feels very strong at this stage of my life, but after I grasped this idea, doubts arose in me that shook my love for Him, and this has caused me a painful and distressing feeling. Because if God gives us all this love, but He Himself needs nothing, then how can there be love? After all, He has no emotions. I will never love my computer.

I know this is a bit complex, and forgive me for my strange analogies — I hope I am not committing a grave sin with my words. Your help is very important to me, because this matter truly weighs heavily on me. Thank you.

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Shalom and blessings,

First, let me congratulate you on your process of spiritual growth. 

In answer to your question, true love is love without conditions — love that is not for the sake of receiving something in return. Our Sages taught: “Any love that depends on something, when that thing ceases, the love ceases. But a love that does not depend on anything never ceases” (Pirkei Avot 5:16).

God created you in order to bestow goodness upon you, but He cannot receive anything in return from you. That is why His love is absolute, a love not dependent on anything at all.

The righteous person is required to emulate God, by loving Him with a love that is not dependent on anything. This is called ahavah lishmah — love for its own sake, for the sake of Heaven, and not for reward. As our Sages said: “Do not be like servants who serve the master in order to receive a reward” (Pirkei Avot 1:3).

The complete person serves God out of love, not to earn reward in the World to Come, and not out of fear of Gehenna, but purely out of absolute love for the Almighty. In this way, the righteous emulate God, who loves us without receiving anything in return, for God cannot take from His creations anything. This is true love, and this is the kind of love required of us — mirroring His own.

When you fail to fulfill your purpose in this world, you are interfering with God’s desire to do good for you, for His purpose in creating you was precisely to bestow that good. When your choices go against that path of love toward Him, you not only “block” the Divine abundance but also act against His constant and greatest desire to do good for you. By way of metaphor, it can be said that you “sadden” God, as a father would be saddened by a beloved son who rebels against his love.

God gave you free choice, and therefore nothing happens in the world outside His knowledge and will, and yet, His intended purpose for you is harmed. The Creator made a chair to be sat upon, not to be broken. A broken chair contradicts its intended function. Likewise, our straying contradicts the purpose of creation, which is His desire to bestow goodness.

You are correct that trying to compare God to human beings is anthropomorphism, because God does not think or feel as humans do. Comparing Him to a computer, robot, or law of nature however is also anthropomorphism, because God is not like any natural force, program, or machine. If He is beyond human emotions, He is certainly beyond human metaphors of machinery. God is beyond any concept our human mind can imagine, whether intellectual or emotional.

At the same time, it is evident that God has wisdom, because He created a supremely intelligent world, operating by brilliant laws, and He created human beings capable of perceiving His existence. God created logic, thought, and a highly ordered universe, which are proof that He has intention, awareness, and will.

Of course, God does not have a “brain” inside a skull, and His wisdom is utterly different from anything we can imagine. We cannot fathom the intelligence of the Creator as it is beyond all human comprehension.

In exactly the same way, concepts such as love and mercy in God are real, but infinitely higher and different from human emotions. Just as God has wisdom expressed in the world, but it is not human wisdom, so too He has love, but it is not human love.

Your question is similar to a person standing before a vast sea, saying, “I cannot grasp this ocean in my mind, so maybe it doesn’t exist.” Or one who looks at the cosmos and, overwhelmed by the number of stars, says, “Maybe there is no universe.”

The fact that we cannot grasp God’s essence does not mean He lacks wisdom or love. Just as we cannot grasp the full scale of the sea or the universe, yet they exist, the same is true with God’s love and awareness. God has divine thought, divine will, and divine love which are beyond all human understanding. And yet, because God created us, He surely understands us. He knows our thoughts, our nature, and our innermost feelings.

Some people think God is a mindless force, but King David already said (Psalms 94): “Understand, you senseless among the people… Shall He who planted the ear not hear? Shall He who formed the eye not see? Shall He who disciplines nations not punish? Shall He who teaches man knowledge not know?”

He who created eyes certainly can “see,” though not with physical eyes. He who created ears certainly can “hear,” though not with physical ears. He who teaches man knowledge certainly possesses knowledge.

So too, He who created human emotions surely understands them. Which means God understands you even better than you understand yourself. He is your Father more than any earthly father could ever be, for He is your Creator.

God Himself commanded every Jew: “And you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your might”. Notice, He chose the word “love”. Not merely “think of the Lord your God,” but “love the Lord your God.” God wants your love — not only your intellect, but your emotional devotion and heartfelt attachment.

God Himself compares His relationship with us to that of a father disciplining his child out of love: “Know in your heart that just as a man disciplines his son, so the Lord your God disciplines you” (Deuteronomy 8).

May you merit to feel loved and to truly love God with sincerity and truth.