The Artist Who Returned to Faith: "After Over 30 Years, I Returned to Painting, and There Was a Reason"

Gadi is a curious child, at an age where he wants to know everything about the truth. He has a brother and two sisters who have not yet reached his level of curiosity. Gadi's father built a sukkah on Eucalyptus Hill in the fields, beyond the orchards surrounding the settlement, and he sits and studies there during the weekdays. Gadi knows that his father is a righteous and wise man, a special person, and he loves him very much, but some children understand it less. Such is Gabriel, Gadi's friend, who once, during a quarrel that erupted during a game, lashed out at Gadi: "You're crazy like your father!" He also added, "Everyone knows your father's crazy. There, he lives in a sukkah, on a hill without water, without a toilet, without air conditioning, even though he has a house!"

These sentences, quoted from the book by artist Gideon Holland, are intended for children, but they are not just a narrative story as might be thought, but an artistic creation that Holland worked on for three decades, aiming to create an exceptional book that would lift children slightly above the ground, provide them with strength and faith, and touch them deeply within the soul.

If you thought we would continue to tell you here about Gadi and his father’s adventures, you'd be mistaken. To hear about them, you must peruse the book "Gadi, Little Prince," but you are invited to discover an equally fascinating tale – Holland’s personal story hiding behind writing the book. It is the story of an artist who, for decades, refrained from painting so as not to jeopardize Torah study, until everything burst forth.

Little Child, Big Questions

"Over sixty years have passed since I was a child, much like Gadi," Holland notes as he returns to his childhood years. "But only now, when I think back to those years, do I understand how much I was in a problem. Because I read a lot and loved fairy tales and interesting stories, but I felt it didn’t fill the void I had. I also read lots of educational books and cultural encyclopedias, with fantastic drawings I loved very much, but something was missing because they explained a lot about what was happening in the world, but did not explain its inner side – where it comes from and where it is going."

Holland notes that as a child he didn’t know how to define it, but now in hindsight he understands that already then, as a young boy, he was searching for the meaning of life. Searches that continued to accompany him also at a later age, leading to a miraculous process of returning to his roots, accompanied by divine assistance and personal providence.

"When my children grew and reached reading age, I was already, *baruch Hashem*, deeply rooted in the world of Torah," he notes. "Despite having worked in the field of art for years and having major exhibitions and famous works, I completely left painting and devoted all my time to Torah study. My children barely knew their father was a painter, but when they began searching for interesting reading material, it returned me instantly to my childhood years and the great need I had for quality and profound literature. At that time, I realized that if there were no suitable books, I would be the one to tell my children tales from my imagination, and so I would tell them stories each evening before bed. Back then, the biggest punishment for my children was when I announced there would be no story that night because they really looked forward to it all day. But still, I felt an oral story wasn’t like one accompanied by drawings, and as a former artist, I was constantly accompanied by the dilemma of how to express the stories also through drawings."

Holland emphasizes he is talking about days over 30 years ago, and even then he began to weave for the first time the stories and drawings that recently became the book "Gadi, Little Prince."

"It took thirty years from the time I thought of this book until it came out," says R' Gideon Holland as he speaks about the book he currently holds in his hands. "Four years ago, I decided to take action and approach the work again," he recounts, "The hesitancy for me was very great; on one hand, I am an artist in my soul and heart and was very attracted to a project that includes writing and drawing, but on the other hand, I knew that if I embarked on such a project, it would limit my study hours in the *kollel*, and my greatest fear was that once I write a book, I would become a 'writer' and 'painter,' titles I have distanced myself from over the years. I consulted Rabbi David Abuhatzeira of Nahariya and asked him if I should proceed with the book, and he blessed me wholeheartedly, giving me the green light to do so."

Painting with Faith

But how did you, as an artist, manage to disconnect from art for so many years?

"It's not that I completely disconnected, but I shifted my focus to Torah study, and that was my main occupation over the years. There were indeed several times when I did paint, like certain sketches that helped me and my study partners understand the learning, or an exhibition I did on the topic of those who returned to faith at Ohr Somayach Yeshiva, but I didn't see myself as a painter nor did I want to be one. As a painter, you have a great responsibility for what you paint, because it's not just taking a brush and standing in front of a canvas, but it's a tremendous power you have in your hands to influence the world. I felt I couldn’t bear that responsibility, so I distanced myself from painting. But when I encountered the great need for children to have appropriate stories with suitable drawings, I could no longer hold back. I understood that I was granted a special talent from Heaven to influence through paintings and stories, and I realized this is perhaps part of my mission."

Indeed, the book he holds today is not a regular book, but a magnificent painting album accompanying the profound and poignant story unfolding throughout the narrative. It is a wonderful creation that has been substantially built over the past four years, following thirty years of prior thought on the ideas.

"I'm not ruling out the need for simple adventure and narrative books in the market," he emphasizes, "but I see a unique value in such a book that allows our children entry into the world of creation of Hashem. It is not a regular book and requires work also from the parents, as it is meant to be like a study book, where a father sits and learns it with his son, necessitating a commitment to joint learning. However, I am sure that if done wisely in the right way, it can be a truly giant gift for our children, who will receive a life message and an hour of quality and learning with their father."

He also has a significant message: "I believe every person can harness their tools and capabilities to bring down the upper lights and influence the souls of their children and their environment. These things do not only pertain to the arts but to every area of our lives. If only we are wise enough to take its spiritual dimension and pass it on, we could positively influence our world. May we be privileged."

To contact Gideon Holland: hollandgidion@gmail.com