A Mother's Heartbreaking Journey to Help Her Struggling Daughter

One of the greatest fears of parents is that their children might stray from the right path. Mothers of young children often cry during Shabbat candle lighting, praying to dispel the ominous predictions about their children. In contrast, mothers of teenagers, who test boundaries and develop signs of rebellion, feel the noose tightening around their necks, fearing that their teenagers' actions might hurt their current and future success. But what can be said for mothers who are already experiencing the reality of 'struggling youth,' torn with worry and sleeping fitfully out of concern for their children racing down the fast lane toward self-destruction?

In the era of Mashiach, the pains are many. One of them is the pain concerning children. Peri Cohen, whose parents once worried deeply over her inability to find her way, shares a story with us. It's a story full of wisdom and emotion about a mother and daughter she encountered while mentoring struggling mothers and daughters: "Once, I came across a video showing people with complete color blindness being given special glasses that allowed them to see the world in color. Until then, they had seen everything in black and white. The video captures their faces from the moment they put on the glasses to the heartwarming instant they burst into tears – the world was no longer black and white. This video is truly touching."

(Photo: shutterstock)

"Sitting Across a Mother Consumed by Disappointment in Her Son"

Peri recounts her familiarity with that kind of sobbing from a completely different situation: "It was when I sat facing a mother consumed by the pain of disappointment in her son. I tried to place those glasses in front of her eyes to make her understand how colorful the world is. Not everything is black and white. The mother suddenly received a colorful range of emotions, the emotions her child experiences, the difficulties, pain, and frustration, as well as an immense desire to bring joy and satisfaction. I know there are mothers who don't feel this way, I know that for now, contentment seems distant from them, but just like face reflects face in water, so a person's heart is reflected to another."

Peri emphasizes an important point. When we, the parents, are aware of our children's emotions and truly recognize that they too are dealing with difficult feelings, the world will be a more beautiful and colorful place. "It's exactly like seeing those documented moments when colorblind people begin to see, and witness the crying from realizing that the world is beautiful, and at that very moment, they turn to those around them and embrace them in happiness."

A Mother's Revelation to Her Struggling Daughter and the Heartwarming Action That Followed

In that instance, she recalls another case of a mother who was also consumed by pain and discovered her daughter, whom she had become so accustomed to being angry with, was actually acting from a very hurt and frustrated place, to the point where the daughter was unable to choose but only to drift and fall. "I saw the mother leaving the meeting, and simply... hugging her daughter tightly! The daughter looked at her mother in surprise, as if glasses revealing the colorful world had been placed on her eyes. She rested her head on her mother's shoulder. It was mutual."

From these real-life stories and the special video of the colorblind seeing the world's beauty for the first time, Peri Cohen imparts an important message to all of us. "Dear mother, let's remember that the world is not black and white. For a child to understand your feelings, you must also find compassion in your heart and enough space to embrace their emotions, and with G-d's help, we'll reach a world painted in bright colors, full of joy and happiness."

Also in Relationships - The rule of colorful glasses works wonders. For your partner to recognize your emotions, you must find compassion in your heart for his challenges and pains, despite all the pain you feel about parts of your relationship that aren't successful."

What House Places an Expensive Mezuzah Case Without a Scroll?

Peri Cohen speaks about a crucial aspect of a woman's spirit that brings true joy to the home – the woman's connection with herself. "For you to have compassion for yourself, to forgive yourself for past mistakes, you must heal your heart, put on the colorful glasses, and see the shining beauty of your soul from another perspective."

"A woman cannot give to anyone before she fills herself up. I always refer to the scripture: 'Love your neighbor as yourself.' On a simple level, it means we must love those facing us as we wish to be loved, but more deeply – love your neighbor, as whom? Like yourself. Do you know what it's like to love when you don't know how to love yourself? Do you know how to give when you don't know how to receive? So first we need to give to ourselves, to forgive, to receive, to compliment ourselves, to give to ourselves and truly love ourselves."

(Photo: shutterstock)

To conclude, she tells a beautiful story with a moral lesson for all: "There is a special story about a rabbi engaged in returning people to belief who visited a certain house facing severe troubles. The rabbi asked the homeowner if he had a mezuzah on his door. The homeowner replied, 'Of course, when my troubles began, I was instructed to buy mezuzahs. I bought very expensive ones,' the rabbi approached the door and saw an expensive mezuzah case, but it was empty. 'Didn't you get a scroll to insert inside?' the rabbi asked. The homeowner replied with a question: 'What do you mean? The instructions? I threw that away when I bought the mezuzah...'"

Why Do Husbands and Children Enter the House and First Ask: 'Where's Mom?'

"Mothers are like a mezuzah at their home's entrance. Every child who comes home first asks: 'Where's Mom?', why does he need Mom? Is it because she's going to ask him to help her shortly? What's so important to him about knowing where Mom is? Even when the husband comes home, he asks 'Where's Mom?'. Why? Is he seeking his wife to critique him again? No. The husband and child need their mom at the door as a barometer. Just as a barometer shows weather conditions, so does the woman at home indicate the home's mood. When mom is happy – the whole house is happy, when mom gives to herself – the whole house learns from her how to give. When mom gives to herself, she is happy, and thus she makes her entire home happy. So let's start by giving to ourselves, loving ourselves, and accepting ourselves, and then the circles around us will naturally be happy."

A mother is like a mezuzah at the entrance of the house; if she doesn't fill herself, she'll be like a mezuzah case without a scroll, empty of any content. If she fills herself, she can protect the family and illuminate everyone with a precious light of love."

Peri Cohen's Personal Story: "The First Label They Gave Me Was 'Corrupted'".