Eliezer Kushitzky, Director of "A New Way" Recovery Center: "I Was Addicted to Theft, Drugs, and Gambling, and I Managed to Recover"

Three times Eliezer thought he had managed to break free from severe addiction, but only the third time ended his maze of addictions. "You need to understand that addiction is not just a technical issue," he tells us. "It's easy to recover outwardly, from experience. Within a week or two, a person can be deemed 'recovered.' But if the inner voids are not addressed, they remain and deepen, making it truly challenging to maintain resilience and not revert to old addictions or fall into new ones."

Theft Breeds Theft

The first time Eliezer was drawn into addiction was as a small, shy, and sensitive child: "When I visited my grandmother, I saw her little cash box open. I couldn't resist and took a few coins. She didn't notice. Excited and a bit scared, I ran to the kiosk, bought popsicles, and handed them out to friends in the yard. I didn’t eat any myself, but I was happy. All the kids were excited and came to receive sweets from me, and I was the 'king of the yard' for a day."

This was the start of Kushitzky's addiction, although he didn’t realize it. "From that day, I found endless opportunities for petty theft: from the neighborhood charity box, my parents, friends, and neighbors. I bought candies and distributed them among friends, ensuring I always had company. I was very cautious not to get caught, anxious about the day I wouldn't have anything to give my friends, and got swept into a never-ending cycle of theft, thrill, social hunger, and yet another theft."

Mask Shattered

Eliezer as a child didn't share his social struggles with his parents, who were busy with daily life worries. There were moments of revealing lies and certain suspicions, but his talent for covering them up left his parents unsuspecting. Then he went to yeshiva, but the addiction followed him.

"I didn’t know any other way to make friends, and the fear of being lonely and abandoned was stronger than me. I found a new break in the rules calling me to steal on Shabbat nights, and I couldn’t stop myself. Every week, I would finish the study session and sneak out of the yeshiva for a spree of thefts. Inside, I was torn, the beautiful show of my life was falling apart, but I couldn't stop stealing."

Shabbat nights became a weak spot for young Eliezer. "In my heart, I felt a great disconnection from the Torah and mitzvot. Every Shabbat night, I would take a taxi to Tel Aviv just to fill the great void in my heart, but no distraction helped. The pain only grew."

When Eliezer reached the age of matchmaking, he hoped to continue the grand facade of his life. He married and started a home but didn’t stop stealing. "Eight hundred students in the yeshiva won't know you as well as your wife," he says with a sad smile, "within two months, my wife uncovered all truths about me, and the relationship fell apart. Rightly so. I was now left alone and rejected, people in the streets couldn’t stop talking about me, and I couldn’t handle it. Loneliness was the biggest nightmare of my life. Without much thought, I bought an immediate plane ticket, rushed to the airport, and fled the country."

Dangerous Smoking

Eliezer landed at the home of some questionable friends from his past, where he encountered his second addiction while running from himself:

"Already on the first night, my friends offered me to smoke drugs. I remember the first joint I smoked. I felt euphoric. Within moments, I soared to another world, without fears, without shame, without existential loneliness. In my lost and miserable state, the detachment and forgetfulness the drugs brought were enthusiastically welcomed by me. Very quickly, I became addicted to drugs. From one cigarette a day, it grew to one before work and one after, and somehow the cigarette became my desire all day long. It became part of life but only systematically destroyed them.

"I tried working and earning, but I couldn't last in any job for long. I switched jobs often, continued to steal uncontrollably, and my feeling worsened. I cared for nothing in life. My only goal was to get more drugs. I stole from friends and employers, got fired again and again, and moved from city to city. Even when I visited my married sister in the USA, my only goal was for her to pity me and give me some money, and if that didn’t happen, I would figure out a way to pull money from her without her knowing... I had no shame or natural sense of family. I was completely enslaved to drugs, not understanding my situation. Drugs caused me mental and behavioral instability. I lost interest in any other activity, and fatigue only increased. I had no day nor night. I was confused and lacked any boundaries.

"It was hard for me. It was bitter, and even the drugs no longer helped numb the terrible void inside. Only in the first few times I experienced good feelings from the drugs, but as I continued, the enjoyment vanished, leaving only a burning need to obtain more drugs."

"People don’t know," says Kushitzky, "but once smoking becomes an intense addiction, the person no longer enjoys it but desperately needs it and can't stop. The first and second times seem so enjoyable and enticing, but when smoking becomes a necessity, the pleasure is gone, leaving only the addiction. My process was very quick because my mental state was very bad, and I easily got swept into severe addiction."

One morning, after a year and a half in the USA, Eliezer decided to get up and return to Israel: "I looked at myself from the outside and was despairing. I saw I had no job, no friends, nothing here. I felt longing for the land. I no longer cared what people said about me. So, without any particular consideration and deep thought, because I didn’t have any during those days, I simply bought a ticket back to Israel."

(Photo: shutterstock)

Quick Rehab

Eliezer returned to the land and decided on a new and balanced life path: "I told myself all my problems abroad were because of drugs, and I decided to quit using them. The decision was determined, and thank Hashem, I stopped by myself. The withdrawal was quick and I had a lot of energy from the move and starting anew."

The rehab was successful, but for some reason, his life did not improve significantly: "Today I know I only treated the outer symptom, and quitting drugs by myself was like putting a band-aid on a deep burn. Even the kippah I returned to wearing was very superficial and stayed on my head only out of respect for my parents and family. Inside, nothing real had been built yet."

He wanted to start a normal life and searched for work. He quickly got a job as a salesman at Pelephone and succeeded in his work. He received a promotion and a good salary and lived in Tel Aviv. But it didn't take long before the next complication arose:

"Once the sense of novelty from the new beginnings wore off, and the thrill I experienced dwindled, routine stirred up all the old feelings of gnawing loneliness. I felt that nobody understood me or saw me, and I had to do something. I bought gifts and surprises for friends, needing greatly to impress them constantly, and even the respectable salary I received didn’t satisfy this internal hunger. The overdraft became a regular visitor in my bank account, and still, I was not calm.

I began playing with work conditions and promised people lucrative communication packages at the company's expense. This was before the telecommunications reform, and the call packages were very expensive. I wanted to pamper certain people I cared about and gave them special packages with large discounts at the company's expense. Without realizing it, I reverted to my previous addiction and stole from the Pelephone company to make friends. I did it in a sophisticated way, and it took the company two full years before they realized my fraud."

Gambling and Crises

Eliezer's world collapsed again: "I was fired with great noise, and many rumors spread about me. I couldn’t withstand the shame and did the only thing I had always known: to run away. He boarded a plane and traveled again to the USA. How symbolic that both times he traveled abroad, the date was Tisha B'Av. It wasn’t planned...

"I didn’t meet my old friends, anyway they were no longer my friends...", Kushitzky recalls, "I settled in a different area and promised myself I wouldn't go near drugs again. I feared their influence and didn't want to fall again. I was full of strength and spirit to open a new page, and for a short period, I imagined I was succeeding and finding my way.

"But then the novelty passed along with the thrill that faded and without control, I was drawn into gambling. It was a turbulent and terrible addiction. I rolled vast sums, took loans, received threats, and entangled myself with criminals. After two years, I hit rock bottom. I lost the business I partnered in, lost my friends. Everyone hated me because I deceived them and took money for gambling. I continued telling distant family members stories of great successes and was left truly alone, wholly without and utterly desperate."

A Letter to the Rebbe

And what did he think to do? The only solution he knew: to run away. For the fourth time, Eliezer bought a plane ticket and sought to open a new, distant chapter. "Today I know I could have continued like this from complication to complication without any progress or growth," Kushitzky says realistically. "If not for Hashem, who helped me and opened a path from an unexpected place."

He was merely hungry on the way to his flight and decided to stop by the Lubavitcher Rebbe's resting place. "There's always hospitality active there, and I knew I could quietly soothe my hunger before continuing to the airport. And if I was already there, I decided to write a note to the Rebbe. I still had time until the flight, and I had never been a scoffer.

"I sat and wrote the letter to the Rebbe, and the words came out like on their own. I poured onto the page all the crises I had been through and all the difficulties, detailing with unusual sincerity my downfall, and suddenly I recognized how terrible and miserable my situation was. When I finished writing, I wanted to enter the resting place, but something inside blocked me. I was very disappointed not to have even approached the grave or delivered the letter, but I felt incapable of doing so."

Finally, Treatment

Eliezer flew to Israel and looked for his place anew. A few days later, he unexpectedly received a frantic call from his sister. "She asked to urgently meet," he recalls, "and when I arrived, she immediately said: 'You need professional help!' I tried to avoid it, but then I discovered she knew everything about me. I was stunned. 'How do you know everything?'

"Mom washed your clothes, saw the letter you wrote to the Rebbe, and read it," she explained, making clear that I couldn’t continue alone. My family didn't give up on me, and thanks to them, I agreed to go to 'Retorno.'

"I entered Retorno thinking I would just sort things out and return to my previous life. I didn’t really intend to change, but seven months in 'Retorno' gave me new life. There I learned how to truly love myself, recognize my qualities, and manage correctly. There I learned that I am never truly alone, whether or not I have friends around me. I also gained tools for proper financial management and understood what boundaries are and how to set them. I worked on internal honesty and how not to lie to myself. I underwent emotional, mental, and behavioral therapy and rebuilt myself anew.

"During the internal work I did there, I rediscovered faith. The only one who can elevate from such a low place is Hashem alone. I returned to observing Torah and mitzvot willingly and wholeheartedly, which was a great gift I received.

New Life

I left Retorno as a 'clean addict.' It is the appropriate definition because someone who was addicted and recovered understands that they must continue being cautious and not become complacent. Thank Hashem, I integrated into work and built a new routine.

A year later, Retorno offered me to become a guide in a treatment group. All the guides there are clean addicts, so they know what to work on and truly understand the group members. I immediately agreed to the exciting offer, knowing how many lives they save and was happy to be part of the privilege."

Subsequently, Kushitzky specialized in mental health and addiction treatment, and today he manages the recovery center "A New Way." The center, founded by Yochi Toledano and Tamar Levy, provides individual and group treatment, as well as family guidance and support throughout the process, all offered by top professionals.

Eliezer surprises us with a full-circle story from Divine providence: "It's amazing to see that even my match was found thanks to the work at 'Retorno.' While working there as a guide, before establishing the outpatient center, my wife worked there as a social worker. The staff introduced us, and the match materialized. My wife says if she had heard my personal story beforehand, she wouldn’t have agreed to meet at all, but Hashem orchestrated events, and she heard about me as a guide working there. She never imagined what I had experienced in life and agreed to meet. Once she heard everything, it no longer bothered her, and we married for a good cause. The ways of Hashem are wondrous."

To contact Eliezer: Kushitzky100@gmail.com.