"I Was Injured in an Accident, My Parents Passed Away, But I Realized: 'There Is a Creator'"

Some people's journey to reconnect with their faith begins in adulthood; others start the path to Judaism at a younger age. But few, like Esther Sheffer, can trace their return to religious observance back to such a young age—nine and a half.

"In truth, this isn’t just a story of returning to my faith, but the story of my life," says Esther, who now lives in Bnei Brak and works in body and mind therapy, focusing on barrier release. She is the wife of the Chief Rabbi of Romania, a mother of six, and a grandmother to many grandchildren, yet at nine and a half, she grew up in a home completely estranged from religious observance.

Life Changes

"I was a happy and cheerful child, the world always smiled at me," she recalls. "But at nine and a half, I went through severe trauma. It was at the end of the Six-Day War when I went with my mother to visit my aunt at 'Hadassah' hospital in Tel Aviv. Generally, I didn’t leave the house often, so I was very excited about visiting my aunt. I wore my prettiest holiday clothes for the occasion—my new light blue dress that I wore the day before for Shavuot and my white shoes. We visited my aunt, who was very happy to see us. I couldn’t have imagined that I would be returning to the hospital later that day, but unfortunately in a different manner.

"From the hospital," Esther continues, "my mother went on to visit another aunt who lived on the other side of Tel Aviv. She sent me home with the shopping bags we had bought that day. But when I arrived home, I was surprised. I found my eldest brother who had returned from the war, after months of not seeing him."

Esther still remembers the magnitude of her joy. "I left the bags at the entrance and ran outside to call my mother and tell her that my brother was back from the front. In those days we didn’t have phones, so I couldn’t do it any other way. I ran and ran through the streets, and despite the long way, I got to my aunt's house where my mother was staying. I excitedly shared the joyous news, and my mother was, of course, thrilled. She stayed with my aunt for a few more moments, but I couldn’t wait any longer, so I ran out to the main road. I saw the traffic lights changing but still ran after a woman who tried to make it across at the last minute. She made it across, but I didn’t. A meter before the sidewalk, a bus came and hit me."

Esther notes that at that moment, because of the severe trauma, she didn’t yet feel pain, and when her mother, who saw the accident through the window and recognized her, rushed towards her, Esther tried to reassure her: "You’ll see, everything will be fine." But the passersby who noticed the accident understood the severity of her injury, and since accessible ambulances were not as common then, one of them volunteered to drive her to the hospital in his car.

"Not Ready to Become Pitiful"

Even the moments that followed, Esther cannot forget: "I arrived at the hospital, and they immediately cut off my beautiful dress and treated my injury. I was hospitalized for many months, initially classified in critical condition, and only after a long while did my condition improve. I underwent orthopedic surgeries and transplants because part of my leg was left on the road, along with my new white shoe, which was later sent to me, and I kept it as a memento."

At that time, she discovered that she was almost the only civilian patient in the hospital. "Almost all the patients were war casualties because before the Six-Day War, they cleared the entire hospital to prepare for casualties that, by miracle, were fewer than anticipated. I would hear the groans of the injured all day, and it wasn’t easy, but on the other hand, I became the 'baby' of the department, and everyone showered me with warmth and love."

For many long months, it wasn’t clear how Esther would come out of the injury, if at all. "I went through very difficult days swinging between life and death, unable to eat or drink, fed only through an IV while weighing about 20 kilograms. The significant turn in my condition came after my mother went to seek a blessing from one of the great rabbis, who gave her a special segulah jam. After she gave me a taste, my condition suddenly improved significantly. I got out of bed and began wandering around the hospital in a wheelchair. From that day on, my condition continued to improve rapidly. I was suddenly overwhelmed by a strong will to recover and move forward. I started walking, determining my pace and distance. It wasn’t easy at all, the pain was intense, but I had a strong ambition and carried out all the treatments with bravery. I emphasized to myself again and again that I do not intend to become a pity case for anyone, I will get through this no matter what."

"Dad Collapsed in My Arms"

"Life wasn’t easy after the accident," Esther continues. "In the secular society I lived in, the physical aspect was important and necessary. Unlike my friends, I couldn’t dance or engage in sports. Many children ridiculed me when they saw me walking around with a cane. But I decided I wouldn’t give up; there was nothing I surrendered to because of the disability, and that was my victory."

At 18, after years of therapy, physiotherapy exercises, and illness, she felt a burning desire to become a nurse and even began studying at a nursing school. During those days, her father was very ill, suffering from severe asthma attacks. Consequently, he had to leave his job as a truck driver and stayed home, suffering from several attacks every day.

"Back then, medicines were not like they are today," Esther relates, "and I remember myself running to the street phone every day to call a doctor. He would, of course, arrive hours later, and in the meantime, my father would suffer terribly. At some point, after many requests, we finally received a phone line but it was a shared line, meaning it wasn't always available to us."

"One evening, while sitting with my father, he suddenly suffered from severe shortness of breath and literally collapsed in my arms. I ran to the phone line, but it was occupied by the partner, so I rushed to the neighbors, and they allowed me to call from their phone. Eventually, an ambulance arrived, but it was already too late. The resuscitation attempts failed, and so I remained at home with my mother.

"Once my father was gone, we had no livelihood either," Esther adds, "and so I found myself as a young girl needing to support the household. I started working as a clerk in a pension and benefits company, initially as a filer, but within a few months, I advanced and after about two years, I became the head of the securities department.

"I was quite satisfied with myself and the profession I had acquired, but my mother was in severe crisis after my father's death, and a huge void was left in her life. She wasn’t old, not even sixty, but her condition deteriorated. At some stage, after a series of tests, Alzheimer's was diagnosed, and taking care of her became very difficult. The main difficulty was the fact that the primary responsibility fell on me since my older siblings were married and didn’t live with us. Five years after my father's death, my mother's condition worsened, she underwent gallbladder surgery, and she didn’t return to herself. I was only 23 when my mother also passed away."

The Most Suitable Figures

How do you recover from something like that? How do you carry on?

"It was really very complicated. I remember wandering through the streets and whispering, 'If there is a G-d, please reveal Yourself to me.' It wasn’t yet a stage where I started recognizing the Creator's presence, but something deep down in my heart was already yearning and searching for the Creator of the world. Practically speaking, one thing was clear to me—I am now filling my time completely to avoid having even a moment free for thoughts and reflection on my difficult situation. Thus, I entered an intensive framework of studies and work, not allowing myself even a minute of freedom. I was always busy: running to work early in the morning and working until five, then going to study, returning home, visiting a neighbor who regularly prepared a hot meal for me, sitting there a bit to feel a sense of family and see people around me, and then going to sleep at home. I would sleep with the radio on so I wouldn’t feel alone."

But divine providence brought a turning point in Esther's life: "In the evenings, at the home of the family that hosted me, there were also a brother and sister who often visited. With time, a close relationship formed between me and the sister, and one day I discovered she was strengthening her faith and beginning to draw closer to Judaism. We started having discussions and debates. Until that day, I naively thought I knew what Judaism was, because my grandparents were orthodox, and I also had Haredi uncles. But my new friend showed me there was a lot I didn’t know. She taught me many new things, and fascinating discussions developed between us. Day by day, I strengthened, and I found myself returning to my faith alongside her."

One day, this new friend told Esther about lectures in Holon by several noted rabbis: Rabbi Reis, of blessed memory (author of the books "Toward the Sources" and future director of the Czernasky Seminar in Tel Aviv), Rabbi Mordechai Neugershal, may he live long, and other rabbis from the world of return to faith. "We started attending his lessons regularly. These lectures greatly brought us closer, and through them, we learned of a framework in Tel Aviv called 'Na'aseh V'Nishmah'.

"I began studying at 'Na'aseh V'Nishmah'," she continues. "At first, I studied there once a week; later, I came more often, and eventually, I went there daily to hear Rabbi David Orman, may he live long, and Rabbi Berkowitz, of blessed memory. In parallel, I also started attending Mrs. Yaffa Blumenthal’s lessons in Holon, who today runs the 'P'amot' Institute. When she saw my friend and me and understood we were in a process of rapprochement, she directed us to a seminar for drawing closer. My friend was hesitant because she didn’t have the money, but I, who was already deep into the process, made it clear to her that I would loan her the money, so long as she would come. Thus we went to the seminar where our eyes were opened, and following it, we both returned to full observance."

Later, she attended the Sela Seminary, where she studied for a year. "At first, they clarified that the seminary was intended only for girls who had already spent a significant time in return to observance, but after a lengthy interview, when they understood the seriousness of my intentions, I was accepted into the seminary and studied there for a year. Shortly thereafter, I was blessed to be engaged to my husband and to establish a thriving home full of activity, thank G-d."

Before Esther finishes her story, she wishes to share an important message: "Looking back, I see that the process of return wasn’t something that happened all at once; rather, my whole life prepared me for it. The disability I suffered from prevented me from participating in various activities, and if I had gone down those paths, it’s very possible that I wouldn’t have found myself where I am today, returning to my faith. In general, I have a sense that throughout my journey, Hashem sent me the most suitable figures who guided me, supported me, and gave me strength to continue. An interesting thing I noticed is that most of the women were named Rachel. Therefore, I named my second daughter 'Rachel' in honor of all those 'Rachels' who helped me along the way."