"Dad Owes Me Nothing": Rabbi Yeshayahu Heber's Wife in a Touching Interview

This interview I conducted with Rebbetzin Rachel Heber, wife of Rabbi Yeshayahu Heber, is one I will never forget. I spoke with her while her husband, Rabbi Yeshayahu Heber, chairman of the 'Matnat Chaim' foundation, lay in the hospital, sedated and ventilated as a result of the coronavirus. I met a strong woman, full of strength and burning faith. Every word of encouragement I tried to offer felt humbled before the great woman standing before me. A conversation that, once you finish reading, you will understand exactly what I am talking about.

Suddenly You Receive Kisses from the Creator...

Friday morning, Rabbi Yeshayahu Heber, known to all of us from the Matnat Chaim foundation for kidney transplants, lies in Hadassah hospital in serious but stable condition after contracting COVID-19. Despite the sensitive timing, when Rebbetzin Rachel cannot stay by his side and all she can do for him is pray, she gives us a special interview with a strong message for the people of Israel. "If one person from the people of Israel is strengthened by my words for my husband's recovery, I am willing to be interviewed even now," she tells me at the beginning of the conversation.

What is the current defined status of the rabbi?

"Currently the situation is stable," the Rebbetzin answers me, "which is good news in these situations. It's important to me that people know the rabbi was very careful. Even before the Ministry of Health issued its first guidelines, he had not left home since Purim. For him, the concept of 'and you shall greatly guard your souls' is of utmost holiness. He also issued booklets of questions and answers with special instructions for all recipients several weeks ago. He wrote very detailed instructions there on how to be cautious and guard against the coronavirus. He enacted strict self-imposed rules even before the guidelines were released, and was very meticulous on this topic.

"How did he get infected? You must be wondering," she turns to me, "it's entirely divine, we have no clear understanding of the source. We have some guesses, but no proven knowledge of it. Also, his COVID did not behave like 'regular COVID' at all. He did not have a cough or breathing problems; there were completely different symptoms with a mild fever. These are symptoms that only 3% of infected people worldwide develop."

So how did you come to get tested for COVID-19?

"The doctor sent us anyway because he had a fever. On the day of the leaven check, a sample was taken for COVID-19, and the positive result arrived with the paramedic who came to evacuate him during the holiday. It was, for me, a 'kiss' from Hashem. First of all, because we received a positive COVID-19 result immediately, and his treatment channel was already known, instead of wasting time in the hospital waiting for a test and result. The second 'kiss' we received from above was that from the moment they came to evacuate him by ambulance, his condition deteriorated rapidly, and the person who came to evacuate him was a kidney donor through our organization, named Chaim Neuman from Kiryat Arba. Chaim is one of our 800 kidney donors and very connected to 'Matnat Chaim'. Chaim told me that when he got the call to go out and was given the address, he couldn’t believe he was going to evacuate Rabbi Heber. When I had to send my husband alone in the ambulance, which is a very hard part of the COVID-19, the loneliness, at least I knew he was not alone. There’s a message that my husband used to often tell people in isolation: 'Maybe you are isolated - but you are not alone, a Jew is never alone.' This is my husband's life philosophy. He went through some things in his life and always tells me: 'I don't feel alone, I will fear no evil because you are with me.' When Chaim the paramedic came here, we did not recognize him, as he was completely covered, but nonetheless, for me, it was a 'kiss' from Hashem, because I knew Chaim was there. Incidentally, Chaim Neuman is the gabbai of the Cave of the Patriarchs and he has its keys. He told me that he went to the grave of Abraham our forefather, prayed, and cried: 'Father Abraham, you are the pillar of kindness, you established the foundations of kindness in the world. Now your son, Abraham Yeshayahu, who follows your path, the path of kindness, needs you to advocate for him.' It was very touching to hear."

And how do you feel personally during this difficult time? Is there something that strengthens you and helps you and the family get through this together?

"This is a period of much concealment," agrees the Rebbetzin, "but we find so many revelations of kindness in it. Even when the hospital calls me and says, 'The situation is stable,' I recite a psalm of thanks. I tell myself that a stable situation, in this case, is also good. I try to strengthen myself and the family all the time. For example, now it’s Friday, so I got up and prepared for Shabbat, because it’s Shabbat, even though it’s not at all easy. Many people also call to strengthen and support, women separate challah in his merit, and this strengthens us. A Jew who has faith can endure the greatest troubles. I think that without faith, you can’t survive something like this, the tension alone can kill you, even if you’re not sick."

(צילום: Yonatan Sindel/Flash90)

The Rabbi Prepared the Ground for Plasma Donations Without Knowing He Would Be the First to Need Them

Since you can't be by your husband's side, you're surely experiencing enormous tension...

"There is definitely tension," agrees the Rebbetzin, "especially because my husband is a kidney transplant recipient, so in addition to the COVID treatment, there’s also the need to care for the transplanted kidney. I must mention the staff at Hadassah hospital, who go above and beyond for him and work in full cooperation with the nephrologists. We are full of appreciation for the hospital. My husband has already gratefully received two plasma doses from recovered individuals. There was an extraordinary response from plasma donors, and for that, I thank each and every one of the people of Israel."

"And there’s another amazing thing," recalls Rebbetzin Rachel, "a few days before my husband started to feel unwell, he spoke with one of our kidney donors, named Lior Frishman, one of the veteran kidney donors in the organization. My husband asked him: 'What do you think, Lior, if we establish a plasma donation unit at Matnat Chaim to help COVID-19 patients?' They agreed that after the crisis passes, they would incorporate the plasma donation unit into Matnat Chaim. Now, unbeknownst to him, he is already upholding his word."

I am amazed, and Rebbetzin Rachel continues: "My husband is a man needed by many. People know him as 'Matnat Chaim', but he is involved in so many issues—ranging from marital peace to advice for people on various matters, of which even I am unaware. He is a person who demands absolutely nothing for himself. Truly nothing. Even on the night of the seder, he felt very unwell, really terrible. But he exerted himself very much to fulfill all the mitzvot of that night. I saw it wasn't easy for him, but he was joyful." The Rebbetzin's voice breaks. "Because I know what he would tell me now, 'Be strong, be joyful', I try to do his will even now when it’s really hard."

Can you tell us how you manage to maintain such optimism?

The Rebbetzin is modest. "Many of my strengths come from my husband," she says, "and it’s hard for me because we’ve been married for 33 years, and I’ve never been alone. Even when he underwent transplantation and was away for public issues, as soon as he could, he would call me. My husband is very devoted, not only to me and the family but also to strangers. A few days ago, an Arab Muslim woman, one of our kidney recipients, called me crying: 'The rabbi is a holy man! Allah watches over him, he is like a father to me.' 'Beloved is man, for he is created in the image'—this is my husband's life philosophy, the rabbi."

(צילום: Yonatan Sindel/Flash90)

"Be Strong, Believe There's None Besides Him"

Do you have a message you wish to convey to the people of Israel during this difficult time?

The Rebbetzin wishes to mention two messages: "First, faith. The faith that there is none but Him. It’s true that we need to make our own efforts and follow all the medical instructions we’ve received, and we infinitely appreciate all the doctors and medical teams who are doing truly holy work. But beyond everything, we need to be strengthened in the fact that there’s none besides Him, and everything is from Heaven. My husband and I have gone through many difficult things in life, whether it's his own transplant, years of childlessness, the accusations brought against 'Matnat Chaim,' etc., but throughout all these years, we have been strengthened in faith that there is none but Him. Another thing I would like to convey to the people of Israel is the subject of the blessing of Asher Yatzar. Recently, we have really started to work on this."

What's special about the blessing of Asher Yatzar, and how can one be strengthened through it?

"The blessing of Asher Yatzar is a very special blessing. Because my husband deals with all matters of the kidneys, and the blessing of Asher Yatzar is a blessing over the removal of waste from the body, we chose to strengthen specifically in this area. It's the only blessing where the divine throne is mentioned: 'before Your glorious throne,' in this blessing, we say 'Who formed man' and not 'Who created or made...,' what does the word 'formed' mean? It teaches us that our body is truly a masterpiece. Everything seems taken for granted, trivial, and simple, but it is by no means self-evident. Perhaps this is the message to all COVID-19 patients and all patients in general, that the One who created this wonderful machine is also the one who operates it, and He can remove the virus or illness in an instant. It is written about the blessing of Asher Yatzar that it is worthy of being at the forefront of blessings of praise.

"We are very excited when we say 'Hagomel' after childbirth or after a serious illness, and Rabbi Wolbe says that the blessing of Asher Yatzar is like the blessing of Hagomel. It is indeed like a 'telegram' that a person sends to his family members saying that, thank God, the operation went smoothly.

"It is told about Rabbi Aaron of Karlin who would recite the blessing of Asher Yatzar in song, to the tune of Hallel. Once I heard Chani Weinroth, of blessed memory, share about herself that when she was a little girl, her father needed a small sum of money like a five-shekel coin, and he didn’t have coins in his pocket. Little Chani ran to her savings box, took out a coin, and gave it to her father. The next day, Chani approached her father and said: 'Dad, you owe me five shekels.' Her father looked at her and said: 'Chani, Dad doesn’t owe you anything.' There's no such thing as Dad owing us something, but at that moment, he took out a 20-shekel bill from his pocket. Likewise, I say: 'Dad in Heaven doesn’t owe us anything,' because He showers us all the time, even though He owes us nothing. However, on the blessing of Asher Yatzar, it is written that there is some 'commitment' that whoever recites it well, clearly, from writing, out loud, it is written in the book 'Hashiach Yitzchak' that they will see great salvations and healings beyond nature. We really see it manifest, how people have seen great miracles in all areas, including maintaining health. Therefore, I want to take this opportunity to convey the message that everyone in Israel should know, that whoever recites the blessing of Asher Yatzar with intent will have special success and protection over health that goes beyond nature. I will be truly happy for everyone who strengthens in the blessing of Asher Yatzar and in the belief that there is none besides Him. My husband is one of so many sick people, God forbid, so I ask that you pray not only for his recovery but for the recovery of all sick people in Israel because Hashem is the healer of all flesh and He is the one who works wonders."

Watch Rabbi Heber's interview with the Hidabroot channel: