"The Illuminators": Lior Eliass Captures Couples Facing Fertility Challenges

Couples go through challenging times on their journey to starting a family. Sometimes Hashem makes it easy, but other times it requires a long journey filled with obstacles and twists. Tests, treatments, disappointments, expectations, and faith are integral parts of the path leading to the coveted destination - becoming parents.

Lior Eliass, married with two children, realized the need to inject encouraging light into the world of families dealing with loss, unfulfilled desire for a child, and intense feelings accompanying the process. She translated this need into a special project that illuminates those dark moments and enhances the happy times, which surely exist nonetheless.

How did this original and moving idea begin? Where did the idea originate?

"I started the project following a miscarriage of a much-awaited pregnancy," recalls Lior Eliass of the painful experience. "I went to the emergency room and realized I'm one of millions of women who experience loss like me but live in silence, hiding, not talking about what happened.

"After some time, I decided to think in my own way about how to enhance what I have and thank Hashem for what He gave me. Along the way, it was also a healing process for myself."

Lior, a children and family photographer, listened to the silent voices and decided to contribute her professional skills to those families. "In this project, I come with my background and my smile, and from there things unfold, and a conversation develops about the journey they have taken and continue to take. Sometimes these are simply magical moments, and all I want is to hug them and say thank you for the chance to meet them."

Spreading Light and Capturing Moments

Lior doesn't stop there. Simultaneously, she nurtures another project close to her heart: photographing 'Mothers without Mothers.' This means documenting happy moments in families of mothers raising their families without a grandmother in the picture.

How did the idea of documenting families without mothers arise?

"My mother passed away four years ago, two months before I gave birth to my firstborn. I occasionally look for shared photos from recent years and find none," shares Lior with regret. "So I decided to dedicate something to women experiencing the same, for we all live with this absence."

The common thread between the two projects is family photos with a backdrop of loss. What did you aim to achieve?

"The project is intended for any family or couple experiencing challenges on the road to having full arms. Families with existing children or without, wanting to preserve good and pleasant memories, and smile each time they look at the photos anew. "I even think it's a form of mutual healing," she says.

(Photo: shutterstock)

"The goal is to have a memento and documentation of happy moments of what exists, despite the absence. Even when I photograph couples without children, the focus is on the 'what is.' There is a relationship, and there's something to be happy about. This way, we learn to say thank you every time we look at these photographs, as it's not taken for granted that we woke up this morning, and we're together."

Additionally, Lior emphasizes that "one of my goals is for everyone to feel comfortable coming because money is not the criteria. Essentially, everyone decides how much or if to pay, so that anyone who wants to be photographed can do so."

"The Connection Continues After the Photoshoot"

To reach the point of implementing the idea, Lior testifies that the process was not easy: "I first had to work through things with myself, see if I was ready to expose my personal story, and talk about myself publicly.

"After that, I needed to advertise so that people would come to me; it’s not easy to approach families I know have experienced a stillbirth, miscarriage, infertility, and other personal details happening in their lives. But later, I saw that most people came to me through word of mouth."

Do families share their painful moments with you?

"Some families open up over the phone or through correspondence, and others need time. When we meet, I first ask them to feel comfortable, as if I’m not there, and act naturally despite the camera. Then gradually, during the shoot, they share. Initially, they ask questions, and then they talk about their struggles. In some cases, the relationship continues even after the camera is off."

How do you cope with the painful stories you hear?

"Sometimes after I hang up the phone, I cry. We are emotional beings, and even if a tear slips beside them, I think it’s legitimate. Mostly, I try to contain, talk, and talk some more.

"There are cases where I hear the personal story, a couple who went through countless crises and difficult times, and wonder what kind of people I will meet. I imagine the saddest people, and to my surprise, when I meet them, I see the exact opposite. Optimistic people filled with faith and hope, brave and bold, happy and so loving that even today, I learn from them what optimism and faith are."

Seeing What Is and Being Grateful

I ask Lior to share a case of a family that impacted her significantly, and she immediately recalls: "A dear couple came to me, every moment with them was an empowering experience that makes me smile to this day. They came to me after two years of fertility treatments, and as a result, the woman said she didn't like looking at herself in the mirror and seeing the difficulty reflected.

"Even at the beginning of the photoshoot, it was hard for them to open up, and I asked them to imagine I wasn't there. They really operated in their quiet way and cute antics typical of them. They made me laugh with them, and the pictures turned out so natural. After receiving the photos, she wrote to me that thanks to the photos, she looks at herself (which is rare) and sees herself as she wanted to - happy and liberated. I felt I touched their inner soul.

"Another family I photographed said they felt taking the photos was a healing for them because they didn't have pictures with their mother, and that's all she wanted - to be left with memories from good times."

What gives you the strength to continue this volunteer activity?

"The light in people's eyes," Lior decisively states. "Also, the messages and conversations after the photoshoots fill me with love for people."

Is there a message you would like to pass on?

"If you have a dream, go with it. If you have a voice you want to be heard, say it out loud with a big smile. Additionally, it's important to document happy moments with the family, see what grew out of nothing, and what great light we bring to the world. That's also my motto - to see what is and be thankful for it, rejoice in what exists even though it's not taken for granted."

To contact Lior, you can reach her by email atliori.ammric@gmail.com

On the occasion of the month of Kislev, Hidabroot is collecting stories of light and gratitude about people who light the way. Do you know such people? You are invited to send their details by email debi@htv.co.il or write about them yourself. Let's spread the great light together!