"Dad Cried and Told Me: If You Leave the Band, It'll Fall Apart"

Michal Kapelnik will probably not forget her almost final public performance anytime soon. "I came back from a kiruv seminar and was seriously beginning my journey into Judaism. One thing I knew for sure: I could no longer perform in front of mixed audiences, no matter the circumstances. However, I remembered we had an important upcoming family performance that my dad wouldn't want me to miss.

"Despite this, one day I approached him gently and tried to appeal to his heart. I knew he also realized this moment would eventually come; it hung in the air like an hourglass. I told him, 'Dad, I can't perform in front of a mixed audience anymore.' He wasn't surprised and didn't panic. He simply said, 'No problem, just perform dressed modestly.'

I hesitated. I tried to explain that the issue was deeper and that I couldn't perform in front of a mixed audience at all. Then he looked at me and asked pointedly, 'And what about honoring your parents?' I tried to explain gently and with much love that the Torah even precedes honoring one's parents, and I asked for his understanding. But my dad was determined and painfully told me, 'A band without a singer is not a band, and because of you, it will fall apart.' I stood there, helpless and speechless, and he felt it and told me sadly, 'You know what? At least perform in the next confirmed show, and after that, do whatever you want.'

My heart sank, but I felt I couldn't resist his pleas. I went into a room and cried my heart out. I prayed to Hashem: 'Master of the Universe, how can I perform in front of men? You know that now that I understand a bit more – I simply can't hurt You like this, I can't perform. Please sort things out for me, Father.'

"When I calmed down, I left the room and, without hesitation, asked my dad to call and confirm that the show was still going ahead. He gave me a surprised look as if I had lost my mind, insisting there was a show as scheduled, and no one had canceled. And I insisted back. In my heart, I recalled the many open miracles I'd experienced since returning to Judaism, feeling that Hashem wouldn't ignore my tears. After several requests, he agreed and called as if to ask what time to arrive.

"During the call, I prayed, and suddenly saw his face change with surprise. His reaction made it clear something had indeed happened. Then he hung up, completely astonished, and asked me: 'Michal, are you a 'Baba' or something? What did you do?' I was in shock.

"It turned out that a relative of the event's hosts had passed away, and they were genuinely considering canceling the performance, but at least, at this stage, they decided to postpone it, agreeing to stay in touch. At that moment, my dad already gave in and said it would work out. And that's when I learned that 'In the way a person wishes to go – that is the path they are led,' and that no prayer goes unanswered. Needless to say, since then, I have never performed again in front of a mixed audience."

So, although not before mixed audiences, Kapelnik never gave up on her personal music career and her great love for the field. Initially, she supported singer Chava Levi with playing and singing at performances for five years.

Over the years, she became a unique singer performing at women-only events, singing in eight different languages(!), believe it or not (Russian, Bukharian, Moroccan, Spanish, Yiddish, Persian, and Yemenite). Additionally, she conducts musical workshops for women and also works as a music therapist, holding a private clinic for children through the unique powers of music.

"I Thought Only Those Who Had Crisis Return to Judaism"

But let's go back to the beginning of the story. In fact, if you ask Michal Kapelnik, she'll tell you she never intended to become religious. Indeed, at the height of an impressive musical career she had started at a young age, as part of a fairly musical family.

She was born in Linben, Bukhara, to the musical Mattatov family, and from the age of three, she began to show signs of innate musical talent. "By age four, I was already performing on stage for the first time, and they already saw the first signs of singing and connection to music. At five, we came to Israel and settled in Ramla. We became a well-known family. In Israel, at 14, I won first place in a youth talent competition at my high school. Of course, as a child, my dream was always to become a famous singer. For me, it was always a talent I received as a gift from Heaven and developed over the years."

Over the years, the band became one of the hottest names in the world of bands. "The truth is he had several bands, but this was simply the most famous. It was our family band, and it was called 'The Star Band.' I was the lead singer and drummer, and I also played the keyboards, percussion, piano, organ, and guitar. My father played most of the instruments, a talented musician who over the years was part of several bands he'd perform with – violin, guitar, organ, drums, and he himself performed from a young age," describes Kapelnik. "Besides him, my brother was the drummer, and my uncles and cousins ​​- all professional musicians and singers.

"At that time, we used to perform on Shabbat, but there was Kiddush, and we had holidays and tradition. We believed in the existence of a Creator and settled for being good people as we understood one should be, through giving and hospitality. We thought that's what Hashem wanted from us, and beyond that, any connection to religion felt too primitive for us."

When she reached the age of 15 and a half, a turning point occurred in her life. "My sister, who is nine years older than me, a beautiful, intelligent, educated girl – began to show interest in Judaism. It was a wonder to me because she truly had everything. She had always been for me a symbol and example of the happiest and most joyful person on earth. She traveled, enjoyed, and was very loved socially. But suddenly, she began to describe feeling emptiness and lack of satisfaction and began asking fundamental questions about life, which I never dared to engage with before, and I was in shock. I had never even imagined it.

"One day, two religious women from 'Lev L'Achim' knocked on our door, wanting to talk to my mom about purity, and she wasn't home, but my older sister was, and we had a mitzvah of hospitality, so we welcomed them, and my sister started showering them with questions. They quickly felt her thirst and offered her to participate in an Arachim seminar. I learned the strongest lesson that when a person truly seeks truth – no matter where they are, Hashem will send them His messengers."

Later, Kapelnik accompanied her sister regularly to Torah classes, where she met various figures, some known, like Rabbi Uri Zohar, and also different singers and stars from the entertainment world she was familiar with – who made her understand exactly where the truth lay, or at least where it wasn't. "In my heart, I felt good as I was, and I felt ashamed, thinking that only people who've faced crises return to religion. In the end, my sister dragged me to a seminar, and what I learned there couldn't be denied. I returned after three days, tearfully embracing my sister and asking her: 'So what do I do now that I know there is Hashem? That the Torah is the absolute truth, and Moses is true and his teachings are true? What do I do with this truth now?"

So what do you do? Initially, Kapelnik tried to carry on as usual and continue studying at the secular high school she attended. "One day, my teacher pulled me aside and asked if something had happened in the family or if someone had passed away. Initially, no one knew about my strengthening of faith, like observing Shabbat, but after the seminar, this became essential to me, and I couldn't hide it, even outwardly. It became a daily matter that everyone was curious about, and they started asking me questions.

"During breaks, all the girls and boys would gather, and I'd prove to them facts from the Torah's truths. Many girls asked me later, following those conversations, if they could join classes, and they ultimately came closer themselves. I was the only girl in the entire high school who dressed modestly, and to my surprise, after a period, I saw many girls started following suit. I think many of them began to strengthen, but were embarrassed about what people would say, and when I was the pioneer, I realized if you take the initial step, you give many others the courage to dare and walk like you, and it's a tremendous Kiddush Hashem. Anyone who dresses modestly and goes against the current certainly prompts thoughts of repentance for others who see her."

But in the end, it came. When the spiritual difficulty intensified, Kapelnik decided to leave the secular high school and move to the 'Lustig' ultra-Orthodox seminary in Ramat Gan. For her mother, this move was especially challenging, mainly because she was worried about the academic standards there, especially since Kapelnik attended a highly regarded high school in the area. "I knew nothing about the Bible, and I arrived at a place where most of the study focused on this area, from a home where academic standards were fundamental. I didn't know how to cope. Over time, I discovered I was learning with girls who were rare human material. Intelligent, diligent girls, with good traits and standards. Each one contributed her time to me, showed me kindness, strengthened me. Girls studied with me until the wee hours of the night what they had learned for years just to help me close gaps and succeed. In the end, I completed my matriculation certificate with honors."

"To This Day, I Don’t Know Who Saved Me"

During the period when she took on modesty, Kapelnik experienced a real miracle that still excites her to this day. "My best friend was having a birthday, and she called and asked if I could join her for shopping after school, and I agreed. That day, I equipped myself with flowers, balloons, and a cake to cheer her up, and when her dad came to pick us up, he parked on the side and was in a real rush, while she, meantime, put everything she got in the back, and I sat inside the car, not knowing he was in a rush, and came out to meet her, one foot out, unaware he'd already started to drive again. He didn't see me, thinking I was inside, and the balloons obscured everything. I was about to step out and suddenly felt someone holding me tightly, not letting me, and I didn't understand what was happening, as cars were passing by, with half of me in the car and the other half out, and a car literally passed me by while I screamed for him to stop, and my friend tried to move the balloons to see what was happening. To this day, I don't know who saved me. Who held me back from stepping into the busy road as he drove.

"Later that day, I went to a lecture and took on modesty. The rabbi, who heard the miraculous story, was moved and told me Hashem saved me with divine providence, and while it cannot be explicitly linked, it is known when one takes on modesty, the Shechinah dwells there, and there is special providence."

"I think it was an angel who grabbed me, preventing me from flying out, miraculously ensuring nothing happened to me. I often recall how someone literally held me back, how close I was to getting run over, not knowing how I would have survived, and I just shudder."

Today Kapelnik is married to a former soccer player, now a yeshiva student, and a mother of three children. But not only Kapelnik and her husband returned home – over the years, every member of the Mattatov family also came back in a big way. "My parents saw how the Torah changed us, they suddenly felt our deep respect towards them, they saw what a true Shabbat table was like, where everyone sits around it calmly, as opposed to the past where we'd do a quick Kiddush and wanted to finish early to hang out with friends. Suddenly, unity and love were created, and they felt it very strongly. Later, they themselves went to a seminar and were convinced of the Torah's truths."

All the men in the Mattatov family are now yeshiva students, and all of Kapelnik’s sisters are also married to yeshiva men. "The secret was the true love that existed between us, the siblings," she explains. "That's what caused the unity and the desire to look out for one another. I remember consulting with the rebbetzin from the Ofakim Seminary where I studied after high school, about my younger sister, who was born after the family drew closer to Judaism and found it hard, choosing to become a model. It pained me greatly, and I asked how we could help her choose our path as well, and that rebbetzin told me: 'If she loves you, she will follow your path,' and it's so true, just like I followed my older sister whom I love so much. Ultimately, my younger sister also returned to her roots just like us. There is no path like this, I wouldn’t exchange it for all the money in the world."

Michal Kapelnik's email - michalkapelnik@gmail.com