The Jewish Birthday: A Day of Blessing, Introspection, and Spiritual Strength

The first and only birthday mentioned in the Torah is the birthday of a non-Jew: “Pharaoh’s birthday” (Bereishit 40). For this reason, some claim that celebrating birthdays is a non-Jewish custom and therefore do not mark the day at all.

There is also a debate in the Talmud: Is it better for a person never to have been created, or better that he was created? The conclusion is that it would have been better for a person not to have been created, and for this reason, according to many, there is no reason to celebrate a birthday.

Reasons to Celebrate

Others argue the opposite and say that because a person has been created, it is fitting to celebrate the day he entered the world and gained the ability to fulfill mitzvot and do good deeds.

Many others mark this day because of its greatness and importance. The Jerusalem Talmud teaches: “On the day a person is born, his mazal (spiritual fortune) is strong and good” (Rosh Hashanah, chapter 3, halachah 8). The day of birth itself — and especially the day of the week on which a person was born, has influence throughout a person’s life, shaping his character and nature.

A Time for Introspection

Our Sages teach that a birthday is a day when a person receives an abundance of life-forces and spiritual strength each year. In most places in the world, birthdays are treated as simple, light celebrations — an excuse for a party. In Judaism, however, a birthday is considered a serious day and a time for introspection. It is the day a person entered the world, and therefore it is fitting to conduct a personal spiritual accounting: Where has he reached until now? What has he done with the strengths he was given? Has he used his life for good — or, Heaven forbid, the opposite?

The Chabad Sefer HaMinhagim writes: “On one’s birthday, a person should spend time alone, recall memories and reflect on them, and whatever requires correction or teshuvah — he should correct and repent.”

How to Celebrate

On a birthday, it is good to increase good deeds and add goodness to the world. It is recommended to give charity on this day, and some have the custom to receive an aliyah to the Torah on their birthday — if it falls on a day when the Torah is read. If not, the custom is to get an aliyah on the Shabbat preceding the birthday.

In Chabad and in many other communities, the custom is for a person to recite throughout the year the chapter of Tehillim corresponding to his age. For example: someone who turns 19 recites Psalm 20 throughout the year, since he has entered his 20th year. The birthday is the day when one “switches chapters” and begins reciting the next chapter.

Special Birthdays

Although there are differing views about celebrating birthdays, certain birthdays are clearly observed in all communities. Besides the day of birth itself, there is of course the Bar Mitzvah, a particularly significant day when a boy becomes obligated in the commandments. This day is celebrated with a meal and with the beginning of important mitzvah practices that he can now perform, such as joining a minyan, receiving an aliyah, and putting on tefillin.

Another special milestone is the 60th birthday. Many celebrate this birthday with a grand meal, because reaching age 60 means a person has passed beyond the category of “karet” (a Heavenly decree that, according to tradition, results in passing away before age 60).

Other Customs

In some communities, it is customary to fast on one’s birthday. Many also complete a tractate of Talmud on their birthday and hold a celebratory mitzvah meal.