"I Knew I Was Touching a Sensitive Subject": An Interview with the Book's Author on Living a Torah Life in the Secular World

Fear and trembling. These were the feelings that gripped Rabbi Avraham Friedman as he considered publishing his new book - 'Torat HaMaaseh.' No, he wasn't worried about the act of publishing itself. This isn't his first book, and he is well-versed in the art of writing. Nor was he worried about the book's content. Three supervisors, as well as yeshiva heads and other scholars, reviewed the book and screened every word. But he feared something else - how the book would be received by readers.

"In recent years, I've published several books on ethics topics," he tells us shortly after the release of his book 'Torat HaMaaseh'. "For all the books, I signed my full name and was pleased to hear that people enjoy them and adopt the ideas and insights recorded in them. These books have strengthened both men and women, whether they belong to the Haredi sector or come from outside it. But my new book - 'Torat HaMaaseh' is different from the previous books. In this book, my aim was to write about the issue of the Haredi man's entry into the workforce and various topics derived from it. This topic is hardly discussed publicly, it's almost taboo, and that's why I was very apprehensive".

Proving There is Both Issachar and Zebulun

Yet despite the numerous fears, Rabbi Friedman concluded that the book needed to see the light of day. "The topic preoccupies so many people, and over the years I observed that many people in the Haredi sector feel that entering the workforce comes at the expense of Torah study, as if it's something illegal. Consequently, even those who decide to do it feel bad about themselves, as if they are committing a transgression by taking care of themselves and their families. They also have another problem: since their Torah perspective claims that serving Hashem is solely through sitting in the study hall, when they encounter the outside world, they don't see it as a spiritual challenge. They lack the tools to handle this challenge, as no one really prepared them for it".

Rabbi Friedman decided to take the plunge and publish the book. "I knew from the start that I was touching on a sensitive and explosive topic, and therefore I chose at this stage to remain anonymous and publish under a pseudonym. I have no hesitation about the contents of the book; everything I wrote underwent very deep scrutiny, but because the matters are complex, there's no doubt that anyone who wants to take things out of context will do so easily."

What's so complex? Essentially, you're saying it's permissible to work. Where's the complexity?

Rabbi Friedman smiles. "No one doubts that entering the workforce isn't a prohibition. The question is how to articulate this 'permission to work'. For many people, the approach to this issue is very superficial, in black-and-white terms: everyone should be a scholar, and only those who can't may enter the workforce, as a last resort. The innovation in the book's approach is that entering the workforce isn't some form of settling but an additional level of serving Hashem. Some people are destined for the immense role of dedicating their lives to Torah, and others are meant for the other role of serving Hashem through the practical world. It's a very important role. I would define it thus: it's not a lower level but an alternative level."

I once heard the correct definition from Rabbi Shaul Breuer (supervisor at Beit Matityahu Yeshiva), who brought the words of the Talmud in the Tractate of Chullin, which compares the people of Israel to a grapevine composed of clusters, branches, leaves, and a trunk. The people of Israel are essentially one entity composed of many parts, and each part needs the other. That is, the clusters cannot exist without the branches, and the branches have no reason to exist without the trunk. Each system contributes its part, creating a hierarchy. Clearly, the highest level belongs to those capable of dedicating all their time to Torah, but even if you're not among them - as long as you fulfill your life's purpose and strive to do Hashem's will and live a Torah life, you're fulfilling your role no less well than they do."

You've explained why those who enter the workforce shouldn't feel guilt or inferiority. But where is serving Hashem expressed in his new path in life?

Rabbi Friedman emphasizes: "The spiritual challenge of entering the workforce is no less than the challenge of studying in a kollel; it might even be greater. When someone enters the workforce or runs a business and does so according to the Torah and sets regular times for Torah study, it's sometimes much harder than studying all day, because it's not easy to balance Torah and work together. It's a daily challenge, about integrity, behaving according to the Torah, guarding one's eyes, and setting times for Torah study for its own sake, without expecting applause or a religious position. The combination of Torah and practical life, or more accurately - managing practical life according to the Torah, is no easy task."

There's Room for Effort

To understand the complexity better, Rabbi Friedman presents a conceptual struggle: "There is a very annoying question regarding effort. Apparently, according to faith, a person is supposed to believe that the money allocated to him would reach him anyway, but he is required to make an effort to receive it. If so, all feelings of satisfaction and ambition accompanying every diligent worker should be contrary to Torah spirit. For the Torah is supposedly mocking him: 'Stop chasing the wind and imagining you're doing anything...'

"On this subject," Rabbi Friedman says, "I discussed at length in the book. The essence of the idea I brought is that Hashem manages the world in such a way that the actions we take lead to results. Yes, there are cases where people reach a high level, and then they are worthy of special divine providence, but generally, the world operates according to the principle of investment and outcome. The feeling of satisfaction is not contrary to the Torah; rather the opposite. The Talmud in the Tractate Berachot says that derech eretz, meaning the pursuit of a livelihood, is one of the things that demand strengthening.

"And even more so," he adds, "It is written in Isaiah: 'He did not create it a waste; He formed it to be inhabited,' meaning: Hashem wants us to settle the world and build it. From a Torah perspective - when a person goes to work, in addition to ensuring his wife and children have sustenance, he is also building the world as Hashem desires. This, of course, provided his intention is positive, and he strives to work faithfully and bring good to the world."

You mentioned earlier that the book also deals with providing tools for the face-to-face encounter with the outside world. What do you mean?

"The truth is this struggle is a part of anyone who steps out onto the street, even infrequently, but without a doubt, the main difficulty is faced by those who start working and in doing so meet a non-religious public on a daily basis.

Indeed, my book includes special chapters discussing the question: how to handle the secular worldview? Because it often happens that someone decides to enter the workforce, goes to academia to attend lectures, and finds themselves filled with admiration. They discover a sea of wisdom even in the first lecture's introduction, and it destabilizes all their foundations. During the studies, questions also arise - how to deal with the scientific world's perception that everything must be proven, and what scientific evidence is there for the existence of the Creator in the world? Here too, I provide a long and detailed explanation."

The Female Perspective

On the other hand, even for a woman who expected her entire life to see her husband engrossed in his studies, it can be difficult at times to see how he changes plans, and indeed Rabbi Friedman dedicated special chapters in his book to the question: how a woman is supposed to cope with her husband entering the workforce.

"This is a very painful issue," he notes, "and I personally know a woman undergoing significant health struggles, who told me that her hardest challenge is that her husband went to work several years ago, after a long period of studying in a kollel. By the way, regarding this issue, I wish to dispel a common myth - there is no connection between the husband's Torah study and the wife's reward in the World to Come. Although this quote is often attributed to various rabbis, I checked and found no one said these things as they are. On the contrary, in the Mesillat Yesharim it's written: 'For it is simple for anyone with understanding that the degrees are not divided in the true world, which is the World to Come, except according to deeds. And only he who is great in deeds will be elevated.' This means that in the World to Come, there is true judgment, and the reward goes to those who faced the challenges that existed and did their utmost. There are no special elites, and there is no reason a woman who faced her role and fulfilled it completely would receive less paradise than her friend who was given a diligent husband on a silver platter."

To such a woman, whose husband left learning, Rabbi Friedman says there is no less important task in life: "Such a woman needs to know that her role is to build a home of Torah, where adherence to Torah commandments and love of the Torah as a supreme value are what resides at the center. She needs to know how to demonstrate Hashem's presence at home and place it at the center of life. Of course, this is a different kind of work from that of a woman who needs to learn to live modestly and with little, as her husband dedicates himself to the Tent of Torah. But even when buying branded clothes, doing so with Jewish warmth and maintaining modesty is performing the work correctly. In any situation, there's work, investment, and challenge."

Throughout the book, you seem to regard work as legitimate, is there any situation where you think a working person needs to stop and reconsider?

"It's hard for me to sum it up in one sentence, but I would define it this way - when a person goes to work, as long as he feels that Torah - its study and observance - is at the center of his life, and he remains true to it, then it is wonderful. But if there comes a moment when work takes over most of his life and he performs the commandments merely out of obligation, then he must reconsider."