A Kidney Donation: "I Thought Only Women Could Give Life"

Lior, 34, was an ordinary healthy man. He got married, had three children, worked for a living, and lived his peaceful life in Kiryat Shmuel. But three years ago, the clock stopped at Lior's family home. His kidneys ceased to function.

The kidneys filter toxins from the blood, and without them, dialysis treatment is needed. To put it mildly, dialysis is unpleasant, involving machines that draw blood from the body, clean it, and return it to the body. This treatment is needed several times a week and lasts a few exhausting hours. Needless to say, dialysis treatment does not allow for a normal lifestyle, impacting work, livelihood, and much more. In his distress, Lior turned to the "Gift of Life" organization and had to patiently wait for a kidney donor, among the 700 (!) waiting in line each year.

Birthday Gift

"I arrived in the evening. They surprised me. It was exactly on the 5th of Cheshvan, my 34th birthday. I couldn't have received a better gift for my birthday. A gift of life," says Lior, who was discharged yesterday from Rambam Hospital with a new kidney. "You received a great gift," the doctor informed Lior. "It's not an everyday thing." While it usually takes a few days for a new kidney to fully function, for Lior it was immediate. "Gabi raised a kidney for me for 35 years in his body," Lior says excitedly, "and now it's with me. I will safeguard it vigilantly."

"People think that having two kidneys means if one gets damaged by disease, the other will save them. This doesn't stand up to reality," says Gabi Revivo, 35, married and a father of six from Peduel, attempting to dispel people's fears about kidney donation. "All those in need of a transplant can testify that the disease affected both kidneys simultaneously, and it was precisely a single healthy donated kidney that saved their lives."

The field of medicine is not foreign to Gabi, nor is the subject of saving lives. In his youth, he volunteered with MDA, served as a medic in Lebanon, worked as a paramedic for years, and today deals with advanced medical device marketing. Yet, he had an old dream he felt he had to fulfill...

What led you to take this step?

"I wanted to do this for many years. My wife says it was even before our marriage, maybe 15 years ago. In the last two years, I heard about the 'Gift of Life' organization, heard about different cases, and was moved. In the last year, I got a green light from my wife and went for it. I wanted to turn the idea into action. Eight months ago, there was a case with someone close to me, which accelerated the idea for me. But there's no doubt it also relates to my work at MDA with patients, seeing people suffer all the time, being in daily contact with them and wanting to ease their suffering. There are things you can do, but there are diseases where you have no medical solution. Here, in the case of kidney transplant, you give a kidney, and the issue is resolved in the simplest way. Two-three weeks, you're out of commission, but afterwards, with Hashem's help, everything is back to normal."

Is there risk in donating a kidney?

"It's all a matter of definition. If someone's child needs it, every father would agree. The same goes for a child donating to a parent, as was the case with Avraham Ravitz, where his children argued over who would donate a kidney. People need to understand that in terms of risk, while there is full anesthesia and surgery, the risk level is very low. It's worth remembering that even when someone brings a child into the world, he supposedly risks his wife. I had a discussion on the matter with someone in my settlement and told him, 'You risked your wife in childbirth.' Women can, God forbid, die from a cesarean section. The point is that people want their own child, their own lives, and they feel a sense of belonging to their child. A cesarean doesn't prevent women from having more children. In our case as well, the operation is relatively simple, and the fear diminishes compared to the act. But even if there are complications, it will affect only the first weeks, but not beyond that. And if we consider the farthest scenario, that you might need an organ donation someday, the Ministry of Health puts donors at the top of the list if ever they need a donation, as a reward for their contribution."

"Dad, are we such selfish people?"

Gabi’s family, of course, did not remain indifferent. "My wife supported it all along the way," Gabi says. "She was a bit worried at first about the surgery, but once she understood how simple the process was, and once understanding what mutual responsibility is and the significance of the act, everything was dwarfed. The kids were amazing. My son said to me, 'Dad, are we such selfish people? If 700 people donate each year, there will be no more needy people.' I showed my daughter a video, and she said to me, 'Dad, this is a great deed. I always thought only women could bring life into the world. Now I understand men can too.' When the kids came to the hospital, they were very excited."

Did anyone try to dissuade you from the idea?

"Some said it might not be responsible, because I have six children. I respect their opinion and concern. Yet, knowing the subject myself, I was sure there was nothing to worry about. My wife was concerned I might have difficulty with the pain, but I told her it would be fine. And indeed, it is fine."

How did you decide whom to donate to?

"Once you're found eligible to donate, they find you a 'match'. They need to find a match according to your blood type. They check that your kidneys are healthy, and you undergo blood tests to ensure everything is okay. If there's a problem, even a small one, they won't take the risk."

Describe the first moments meeting Lior and his family.

"It's hard to describe. It's a rare experience. His father saw me from afar and asked me, 'Are you the kidney donor?' I asked him, 'How do you know?' He told me, 'We've been waiting for you.' There were many thanks from him and his wife."

And the meeting after the surgery?

"It was a wonderful feeling to see that everything was okay. Understanding that Lior no longer needs dialysis, and that his life and his family's life, will, with Hashem's help, change drastically. It's a privilege that fell to my lot."

Words for those who are afraid?

"We need to explain to them that there is nothing to fear. It's a simple act that comes with the possibility of saving a human life and allows people like you and me to live. It's an act of gratitude, to say to Hashem, 'You've given me good, I'm giving good to others.'"

The ruling of Rabbi Ovadia Yosef, may he rest in peace: It is permitted and even a mitzvah for a person to donate one of their kidneys to save a person of Israel who is in the danger of kidney disease. This mitzvah is deserving of infinite protection. However, certainly, this should only be done through expert doctors, and "one who keeps a mitzvah will know no evil thing."