When Was the Last Time You Sat Alone With Yourself? Here’s What You’re Missing

Waiting for the train, sitting alone in a coffee shop, or even a brief moment between tasks – what's the first thing we do? We pull out our phone, check notifications, or look for something to 'do'. Silence has become the enemy, an empty moment seems like a waste of time, and just the thought of being alone with ourselves feels intimidating.

How did we get to the point where every free moment must be filled with stimuli, and what happens to us when we stop fearing the silence?

What Made Silence Unbearable?

1. A Culture of 'Always Busy'

The modern world rewards constant activity:

Those who are busier are considered 'more successful'.

Those who take a moment to pause appear as if they aren't trying hard enough.

In other words, if you have time to think, you're probably not sufficiently 'in the game'. This is how we were taught to hate silence, because silence feels like a stop, and the world does not tolerate stops.

2. The Fear of Meeting Ourselves

When everything is quiet, we're left alone with our thoughts – our emotions, anxieties, fears. Instead of confronting them, we fill ourselves with distractions to suppress them.

Endless engagement with screens, entertainment, or tasks is a way to escape from ourselves. But when we flee from silence, we also miss the opportunity to truly know ourselves.

3. Screens and Distractions – The Easy Escape

Our phone is an available and immediate solution:

A moment of boredom? There’s endless content to watch.

A moment of sadness? You can focus on amusing videos and forget about it for a bit.

As we get used to relying on external stimuli to avoid silence, our ability to be alone weakens. Boredom and solitude – two important forces for mental development and creativity – have become something to defeat at all costs.

Why Is It Important to Learn to Be Alone?

1. Silence Is Where Deep Thinking Occurs

Great ideas, insights about ourselves, and real connection come when we let our thoughts wander. Without interruptions, the mind can connect inward, solve problems, and understand things we couldn't see amid the noise.

2. Being Alone Is Knowing Who You Are

When silence surrounds us, we learn to listen to our inner voice:

What are we really feeling?

What are our desires?

Where are we in life?

To know ourselves, at times, we must be alone with ourselves.

3. Boredom Breeds Creativity

Among all the 'empty' moments that seem like a waste of time – hide moments of inspiration. When we are not distracted, the mind begins to create. The most creative ideas are born precisely when we are 'doing nothing'.

How Do You Learn to Love the Silence?

1. Start With Small Intentional Quiet Moments

Try leaving your phone in the bag for 10 minutes.

Sit alone with a cup of coffee without any distractions.

Just look around or let thoughts come.

2. Accept Boredom as Part of Life

Try to see boredom not as an enemy – but as an opportunity. When you feel 'bored', instead of escaping to screens – see what your mind offers for you to think about.

3. Schedule 'Meetings' With Yourself

Dedicate weekly time to yourself – without distractions.

You can go for a walk, sit in a quiet place, or simply stay home alone and listen to what arises within you.

4. Disconnect Background Noise

Reduce intentional screen time: an hour a day without a phone or notifications.

Begin to notice how many unnecessary stimuli you’re adding to your life – and reduce them.

In a world that teaches us to escape solitude and boredom, the ability to be alone with ourselves is powerful.

Silence may feel intimidating at first, but if we learn to listen to it, we will discover a treasure: an opportunity to know ourselves deeply. A space to think, create, and rest. Because sometimes, the most important moments are precisely those when we do nothing – just breathe, feel, and allow ourselves to simply be.