What Does Repentance Mean, and How Long Does It Take?

Yom Kippur is the holiest day of the year, when the sins of Israel are atoned for, as it is said: "For on this day He will atone for you, to purify you; you shall be cleansed from all your sins before Hashem" (Leviticus 16:30). It is a holy day of forgiveness and purification, for those who fulfill the condition for it - repentance. Rabbi Shlomo Ephraim of Luntschitz, author of the 'Kli Yakar' commentary on the Torah, writes about this verse: "Before the great and awesome day of Hashem, purify yourselves through repentance, and afterward Hashem will purify you through atonement." How does one repent? Repentance consists of three stages:
a. Regret and abandonment of the sin.
b. Verbal confession of the sin.
c. Resolution for the future not to repeat the sin.

It should be noted that for transgressions between man and Hashem, repentance and Yom Kippur atone, but not for transgressions between man and his friend. Therefore, if wrongs have been committed against others, one must appease them and ask for forgiveness, either directly or through intermediaries.

Therefore, even if one has failed in transgressions, it is possible to repent for them, leave the past behind, and start anew. King Solomon, the wisest of all, says, "There is no righteous person on earth who only does good and never sins" (Ecclesiastes 7:20). Everyone has their falls. But what sets the righteous apart is their resilience; they rise from each fall. They do not despair of themselves, but return to strengthen their service to Hashem again and again, as King Solomon also said, "For a righteous person falls seven times and rises, but the wicked stumble in calamity" (Proverbs 24:16).

One explanation of the verse in Psalms "They have bowed down and fallen, but we have risen and remain upright" clarifies that it could have been written "They have bowed down and fallen—and we did not fall," but it is not written this way because there cannot be a reality of "we did not fall," since everyone falls. The difference is we rise from the falls and remain resilient, while 'they' remain in their downfall.

The Torah teaches us that it is always possible to start anew through the concept of the Nazarite. A Nazarite is someone who has taken upon themselves three prohibitions for a certain period: abstaining from wine, not cutting their hair, and avoiding contact with corpses. If they violate one of these prohibitions, they must bring a sacrifice, and the Torah says, "And he shall atone for his sin concerning the soul, and sanctify his head on that day" (Numbers 6:11).

Rabbi Yisrael Alter, known for his book 'Beit Yisrael', explains the words "and sanctify his head": "A Nazarite who has taken upon themselves not to drink wine or not to cut their hair, and suddenly fails to keep their promise, may think: See, you cannot adhere to anything; look how you fell. Couldn't you be more careful? You are a lost cause. And perhaps they may even magnify these thoughts to themselves by thinking Maybe Hashem doesn't want my deeds, maybe it was arranged from Heaven that I would fall? The Torah tells this precious person who has despaired, "sanctify your head, cleanse your mind of unnecessary and despairing thoughts, and start a new vow from today onward."

The Weekly Challenge

Right before the sealing on Yom Kippur, which will determine what will happen to us in the coming year—take one small vow of commitment. A small step towards strengthening oneself will demonstrate to the Creator our desire to progress and improve, and thus, we can plead on the day of the final seal for sweet and favorable decrees.