Everything is Falling Apart: How to Cope with Today's Challenges

Hello Rabbi, I have been a baal teshuva for several years, striving to strengthen myself and do what is expected of me, but lately I feel everything is falling apart...everything is becoming extreme and bizarre, in all aspects, especially economically, socially, and family-wise. It seems I'm not the only one feeling this way, particularly among my fellow baalei teshuva. Is there an explanation for how to deal with this wave?

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This is indeed a difficult question, and we can never claim to interpret the mysteries of Heaven. I also feel the birth pangs are hard, frequent, and painful. There is no doubt that significant events are happening in the world, calling us to strengthen and draw closer to Hashem, as explained in all the sacred books.

It is told about several great rabbis that when parents who were unable to have children came to them for a blessing or advice for salvation, the rabbis would first instruct them to go to a doctor to diagnose if there was a medical cause for the issue. Similarly, before seeking solutions to any issue or understanding divine plans, we must ensure we are doing our part.

Searching for the spiritual root of road accidents cannot replace the very real and important need to raise awareness about road safety. In every area, the rush to seek a spiritual explanation does not always stem from profound faith, but sometimes covers up laziness or lack of appropriate attention to necessary efforts.

When a person is on an unsuitable path, Hashem uses reality to sharpen it, making situations extreme and exaggerated so we can see with our own eyes that we are not on the right track.

In the field of livelihood, for example, many people are willing to live their entire lives in mediocrity and hardship, suffering all the unpleasant side effects for years. Therefore, they experience layoffs, crisis, or trouble requiring them to gather substantial money in a short time. While in the short term, it is frustrating, eventually, one may see how it was beneficial because this new situation intensified their predicament and forced them to find ways to utilize their talents, freeing them from the bubble of comfort and stagnation.

Sometimes a person is willing to endure bitter suffering to avoid change. They are accustomed to their suffering, justifying themselves with various empty excuses and living a life that is not truly alive simply due to fear of the unknown. In G-d's great kindness, He causes extreme exaggeration, illustrating how intolerable their situation is. Although initially, it brings great discomfort and helplessness, deeper contemplation reveals that this is actually the key to salvation because this causes us to take action and change the situation. Just as the Israelites in Egypt toiled in back-breaking labor, the Torah attests that only when they had to gather straw did they pray with all their might for change.

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Many times a person lives in a place that is not suitable for them, and they are unaware of how unsuitable it is. It could be that although the person has some personal escape points, their family suffers bitterly, so Hashem arranges extreme situations that illustrate the differences between them and their environment, motivating them to not compromise and seek a more successful place.

It is precisely the trial and difficulty that force us to discover hidden strengths within ourselves that we may not have known existed. This is how the body is designed, releasing special hormones in emergencies that allow it to act powerfully and supernaturally. This is also how the soul is designed, where in emergencies and without other options, magnificent creativity emerges, otherwise dormant in routine life.

This is also how spiritual worlds are structured, as explained in the Torah. When the Israelites came from Egypt to the land of Canaan, they lived in the houses of the Canaanites who lived there before. In that time, it was known that if someone transgressed with slander, they suffered the unpleasant affliction called: "house leprosy" which affected the walls with mysterious blemishes, causing great discomfort. One had to take all the contents of the house outside, to the degree of potentially needing to demolish and destroy the house. It was undoubtedly an unpleasant punishment, but within it laid a strange consolation: within the wall, many times, ancient treasures hidden by the Canaanites were found (as stated by Rashi, Leviticus 14:34, quoting the Midrash, that the Amorites hid their treasures in the walls of the houses during the forty years that the Israelites were in the desert, and thanks to the blemishes, the homeowner demolished the walls and found those treasures). This teaches us an important lesson: even if we fall and even if we are in a low state, we have the opportunity to contemplate and discover new paths, which may have been blocked due to success and stagnation.

Our world is undergoing enormous changes in all areas, and it is clear that not everything depends solely on our small efforts. We need to seek the spiritual improvement required of us, but we must not neglect the first step- the base upon which everything stands- the natural, human desire and the integrity, to make as much effort as possible order to create an island of calm and normalcy within our lives.

To purchase Rabbi Dan Tiomkin's books, 'Mekom Shebaalei Teshuva Omdim,' click here.