A Bouquet Before Yom Kippur: One Rabbi’s Lasting Love

During the days between Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur—known in Judaism as the Aseret Yemei Teshuvah, the Ten Days of Repentance—Rabbi Mordechai Gifter, the head of the Telz Yeshiva in Cleveland, would immerse himself completely in preparing his soul for the Day of Judgment.

His children remember how seriously he took these holy days. On Rosh Hashanah, he would sit at the table full of awe, even shaking with the fear of judgment. He didn’t allow any small talk—every moment was treated with deep respect.

And yet, amid the spiritual intensity, Rabbi Gifter never forgot something deeply personal: his wife's birthday fell during this very time. Each year, right before Yom Kippur, he would make sure to bring her a bouquet of flowers.

This became his heartfelt custom. After the Mincha prayer—the afternoon service—just before the final meal before the fast began, he would ask one of his students to take him to the flower shop. Holding a beautiful bouquet in hand, he would return home and bring it to his wife in honor of her birthday. Year after year, the flowers he chose graced their Yom Kippur table.

Even when illness struck and Rabbi Gifter began walking with a walker, he didn't stop. That year, he sent someone else to buy the bouquet, but he himself carried it—balanced on his walker—and presented it with his own hands to the Rebbetzin.

As his health declined and he needed a wheelchair, he still refused to give up this tradition. He placed the flowers on his lap and wheeled himself over to his wife, making sure she received them with honor.

Eventually, his condition worsened, and he was confined to bed. He could no longer give her the gift himself. So this time, it was the Rebbetzin who quietly continued the tradition. She went out and bought silk flowers—ones that wouldn’t fade or die—and brought them home. She gave them to her husband, telling him that she had continued their beautiful custom and bought the birthday gift he always gave her.

This quiet, tender gesture became a legacy of love. It’s an authentic story of shalom bayit—peace and harmony in the home—and a lasting example of how small acts of thoughtfulness can strengthen the foundation of a Jewish marriage.

To this very day, the silk bouquet still stands in the Rebbetzin’s home. For 15 years now, she lovingly cleans the vase and refreshes the flowers as a reminder of their shared devotion.

May his soul be bound in the bond of life (tehei nishmato tzerurah b’tzror ha’chayim).