From Skepticism to Soulmate: A Shabbat Journey

Jacob Yakutilov was 34 and still hadn’t found his match. A successful lawyer and businessman, he couldn’t understand why out of all areas in life finding a wife seemed impossible. He had met over 200 women, yet none of those meetings led to something real.

“One day,” he shares, “I decided to go to Bnei Brak to ask for a blessing from a tzaddik (a righteous Torah scholar). The rabbi gave me a blessing and said, ‘Shabbat is the source of blessings. Start observing Shabbat and see what it brings you.’ I agreed, even though my family was very amused. They didn’t understand what Shabbat had to do with finding a bride. But I stuck with it.”

On the third week of keeping Shabbat, Jacob’s barber introduced him to Anat, who would later become his wife. “The amazing part? She also started keeping Shabbat the very same week I did! She even showed me Facebook messages that proved we had observed that first Shabbat together, each in our own homes.”

At first, Anat was unsure. She was becoming more religious and was cautious. “She told me that from my Facebook pictures, it didn’t look like I was observant. I said, ‘You’re right,’ and I was ready to end the conversation. But then I stopped myself. I told her the truth, I had begun keeping Shabbat, I was eating only kosher, and I put on tefillin every morning. When she heard that, she agreed to meet.”

Their first date was in Jerusalem, where Anat lived. Jacob has a touching memory tied to this. “I remember being 19 at a family event when someone asked me when I would get married. I wasn’t thinking about marriage back then, but I said, ‘My wife will be from Jerusalem.’ I don’t even know why, I lived in Be’er Yaakov and had no special connection to Jerusalem. But somehow, that’s what happened.”

That first date was different. “Usually my dates ended after 40 minutes,” he says. “But we sat for six hours. I couldn’t believe I was sitting across from someone I had always thought didn’t exist.”

When Jacob got home, his parents asked how the date went. “I told them, ‘That wasn’t just Anat speaking, angels were speaking through her.’ They were shocked. They’d never heard me talk like that before.”

That Shabbat, as was his new habit, Jacob went to shul (synagogue). “I like to open the ark and also buy the fifth aliyah (Torah reading portion). That Shabbat, I bought it without even knowing what the portion was. When I approached the ark, my uncle told me he had purchased the honor of taking out the Torah scroll, but he gave it to me. I opened the ark and took out a scroll and of all the scrolls, I took out the one dedicated in memory of my grandfather. Then, during the fifth aliyah, what did I read? The splitting of the Red Sea. For years, when people asked me why I wasn’t married, I’d say, ‘Finding a match is like splitting the sea.’ And now, that was exactly the portion I read.”

One month later, Jacob proposed to Anat. “Months earlier, I had visited a scenic spot in Meron, overlooking the graves of tzaddikim, and decided that if I ever proposed, it would be there. And that’s where I did it. Afterwards, we went to a nearby synagogue with a Torah scroll I had donated. The rabbi opened it for Anat and the spot he opened to was about Shabbat, from Parashat Ki Tisa.”

When Jacob told his parents he was getting married, his mother called her aunt with the joyful news. The aunt asked what family the bride was from. “You probably don’t know them,” Jacob’s mother replied, “but her last name is Chatamov, and they’re from Jerusalem.”

The aunt paused. “Do you remember that 35 years ago, when you and your husband couldn’t have children after six years, I sent you to get blessings from tzaddikim in Bukhara?”

“Yes,” the mother answered.

“Well,” said the aunt, “do you remember the young man who drove you everywhere for three days and was so kind, wanting you to have children?”

“I don’t remember exactly it was so long ago.”

“That young man,” the aunt said, “is Jacob’s grandfather. Your future daughter-in-law is his granddaughter.”

Jacob, the only child born to his parents after years of waiting and blessings from tzaddikim was now marrying the granddaughter of the man who helped his parents along their path to becoming parents themselves.

“We saw such clear hashgacha pratis (divine providence) every step of the way,” Jacob reflects. “And it didn’t end with our wedding. Eight months later, a doctor told us we likely wouldn’t have children naturally. I was heartbroken. But my wife reminded me: ‘Children come from Hashem, not from doctors.’ Exactly nine months later, our son was born healthy, naturally, and without any treatments.”

Now married for three years, Jacob and Anat recently decided to share their story. “We weren’t sure if it was the right time,” says Jacob, “but now we know. If the miracles we experienced can inspire other Jews to return to Shabbat and strengthen their faith, that’s the greatest reward we could hope for.”