Living with ADHD: Building Self-Awareness and Inner Strength

Self-awareness is the ability to recognize your strengths and weaknesses, to see both the gifts Hashem gave you and the areas where you face challenges. It’s about knowing yourself honestly, with compassion, not only to grow, but to better connect with others as well.

This awareness develops through many things: the feedback we get in childhood, our life experiences, and our ability to reflect on our thoughts, feelings, and behaviors.

For someone living with ADHD (Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder), this kind of honest self-awareness can be incredibly empowering. When a person understands both their difficulties and their strengths, they can create tools to manage their life in a healthier and more productive way. They can avoid triggers, nurture themselves, and lean into the things that help them succeed.

Here are some personal strategies that individuals with ADHD often use to manage daily life:

A – Slowing Down on Purpose
Some people intentionally choose to slow their pace to better control their thoughts and actions. The benefit is that tasks get done more thoroughly and calmly. The downside is that this can seem inefficient in a fast-paced world that rewards speed. This approach is often seen in firstborns and in many girls.

B – Letting Impulses Lead
On the opposite end, some people release control and let their impulses guide them. This can lead to quickly starting many tasks, but they are often left unfinished. While it may feel productive in the moment, it usually doesn’t bring lasting success.

Both of these methods have emotional costs. When someone feels “different,” or senses that others are judging them, it can lead to anxiety or a feeling of being out of place.

C – Creating Internal Stimulation
This is a more effective and focused method. It works by increasing adrenaline in a healthy or unhealthy way, depending on the choice of activity.

1. Positive Stimulation: This means giving the brain a boost in a healthy way, through physical activity. This can include standing while working, walking, running, or even something as small as tapping a hand or taking breaks during studying. Movement helps release built-up energy and increases focus.

2. Risky Stimulation: This includes two categories:

   • Unhealthy substances like sugar, caffeine, alcohol, or smoking. Research shows that people with ADHD are five times more likely to develop addictions.

   • Provoking behavior, like teasing or annoying others, not to start fights, but to stir up energy and excitement. This might be directed at siblings, classmates, or even teachers or parents, and can damage relationships over time.

D – Internal Motivation
This is one of the most powerful and positive tools for someone with ADHD. Many people with ADHD discover that they can concentrate very well on things they love, subjects or activities that truly interest them. In those areas, they often thrive. The key is to build on that motivation, recognize what brings passion and focus, and use that strength to guide other areas of life.

With Hashem’s help, and with support from both inside and outside, like family, teachers, and professionals, every person can find their path forward. Living with ADHD may bring unique challenges, but it also brings unique strengths. Through awareness, connection, and care, those strengths can shine.