Navigating Life with ADHD: Expert Tips to Stay Out of Trouble

Adults with ADHD may no longer display the hyperactivity seen in children with the condition, but their impulsivity is still very much alive—and often gets them into trouble. Dr. Russell Barkley, an American psychiatrist and one of the world’s foremost authorities in the field, offers five pieces of advice to help save you from yourself—or more precisely, from your impulsiveness.

1. Just Stop. Your boss suggests an idea, and you immediately blurt out: 'Are you crazy?' Your mother-in-law asks your opinion on the new flooring, and you reply: 'Looks outdated!' You've just stumbled upon a pair of shoes you adore and buy them immediately despite the steep price, leaving you without money for necessary payments. Everyone with ADHD has situations where they’re likely to act without thinking—and this spontaneity can have destructive consequences. Make a list of these situations (this shouldn’t be hard, based on past experience). Develop a strategy that buys you time to think whenever you find yourself in one of these scenarios. Some strategies: place your finger on your lips for a few seconds, take a deep breath and tell yourself: 'Let’s think this over,' repeat in other words what your counterpart said, and so on. The goal: to get those critical seconds where your judgment can intervene and stop the impulsive action.

2. Create Mental Movies. People with ADHD have a weak non-verbal working memory. What does this mean, in plain English? It means you struggle to visualize past situations. Even if the debt collectors have been to your house twice already because of financial irresponsibility, this memory won’t automatically come to mind when you’re about to make an unnecessary purchase. The solution? Whenever you stop yourself, as described in the previous section, quickly assemble a virtual screen in your mind. Consciously think: have I been in this situation before? What happened as a result? Imagine the scenario in detail. By forcing yourself to recall how bad you felt the last time you couldn’t resist temptation, you’ll find it easier to avoid it this time.

3. Focus on the Future. ADHD involves a kind of time blindness: people with ADHD find it hard to tackle tasks they don’t find interesting, just due to possible future negative consequences. As a result, assignments go unsubmitted, bills unpaid, and clothes end up on the floor instead of in the laundry. To overcome this, train yourself to consciously think about the future and ask yourself: 'How will I feel when I finally submit that paper?' (Pride, satisfaction...) 'How will I feel when all my bills are finally paid?' (Immense relief) Try to imagine the good feeling that completing the task will bring you every time you face a task you dislike.

Break the Task into Smaller Steps. Because ADHD makes even the near future seem as distant as the next millennium, it’s unreasonable to expect people with ADHD to invest significant time and effort in non-urgent tasks or those requiring specific steps in sequence. Therefore, it’s advised to break each daunting task into smaller parts. For instance, divide the task into half-hour or hourly segments and write down what you need to do within that time frame. Highlight the part you’re currently working on with a bright color to stay focused. Additionally, consider asking a colleague or a supportive supervisor to check on your progress from time to time—it’ll encourage you to stay on track. Remember: it's essential to praise yourself, take a short break, and give yourself a small reward after completing each task portion. If you’ve asked someone to track your progress, update them on each stage’s completion as well.

4. Keep Your Sense of Humor. While ADHD can have serious consequences, it doesn’t mean you have to be all serious! Catch yourself talking mindlessly? Smile and say something like: 'Oops, my ADHD is talking again. I’ll try to control it next time.' This way, you take responsibility for the mistake and apologize, but also explain why it happened and promise to improve. This approach has been shown to help people with ADHD maintain their self-esteem—as well as their friends and their job.