The Secret to True Joy: How to Overcome Depression Through Gratitude and Faith

“And you shall rejoice on your festival… and you shall be only joyful”
(Deuteronomy 16)

One of the commandments we're given during the holidays- especially on Sukkot- is the mitzvah of "and you shall be only joyful". This is a Torah commandment: You are obligated to be happy! The Sefer HaChinuch writes: “Joy is a vital emotional necessity for a person.” We are commanded to rejoice during special times to remember G-d’s kindness. This channels joy in the right direction and prevents it from being misused. Joy, he explains, is like medicine for the soul- a remedy for depression and emotional distress.

What Is Depression or Mood Disorder?

Major Depressive Disorder (MDD) is a mental illness characterized by a persistent (at least two weeks) and widespread pattern of low mood, accompanied by low self-esteem, loss of interest or pleasure in enjoyable activities, anxiety, appetite disturbances, low energy, pessimistic thoughts, and sometimes even suicidal ideation. It also often includes difficulty concentrating, memory issues, and significant impairment in daily function. Many also report feelings of emptiness and emotional numbness.

In Israel, “About 7.5% of Israelis take medication for depression and anxiety. Data from the HMOs shows a more than 50% increase in antidepressant use in the past six years- including a sharp rise among children aged 4–15.” Dr. Ilan Tal, a psychiatrist in Tel Aviv, explains that a higher standard of living doesn't necessarily reduce depression rates. "People flying abroad more often or living with greater financial comfort aren't necessarily happier. True happiness is tied to meaning in life, not wealth."

In the U.S., “77% of the adult population is not mentally well.” In “the land of unlimited abundance,” an article by Jim Windolf in The New York Observer reveals how widespread mental distress has become. Depression rates have been steadily climbing since the 1940s, and the U.S. has some of the highest rates in the world.

What Causes Depression?

Studies in psychology suggest that depression is driven by our thoughts, worldviews, and mental narratives. Most of our anxiety is not about the immediate present but about what was or might be. We worry about our fate, our family, our livelihood, our health.

The antidote is to rejoice in the present moment! Plan for the future, and learn from the past, but stay grounded in the blessings of now.

• Can you walk, pray, learn, function independently- even if not perfectly? Rejoice!

• Do you have food and clothing, work and a modest livelihood? Rejoice!

• Do you have a bed and a roof over your head? Rejoice! (20% of the world lacks shelter.)

• Do you have children- even if not always easy? Rejoice! (5% of the world can’t have children.)

• Are you married- even if not always harmoniously? Rejoice! (Divorce rates are 40-50% for first marriages and higher for second marriages.)

The Key to Joy

The secret is to see, acknowledge, and appreciate the good around us. The mind will always compare- "but my neighbor has a nicer house, car, vacation, kids, marriage, income"- but do you truly know what’s going on behind their closed doors? That perfect house may be filled with loneliness or struggle.

Jealousy, comparison, and constant "what if" thinking are a fast track to sadness. Instead, train your mind to focus on you, in this moment, with faith that everything that happens is guided by Divine goodness. You are given exactly what your soul needs to fulfill its mission.

As Rabbi Nachman of Breslov said: “Everything that happens to a person is for their benefit.”

And as the famous quote goes: “The past is gone, the future hasn’t happened yet, and the present is like a blink of an eye- so why worry?”

Joy Is a Daily Spiritual Workout

It’s not easy. The inner voice of doubt and despair will always try to pull you down. Keep saying “This too is for the good.” Laugh, smile, give thanks. Thank G-d for the “bad” just as you thank Him for the good. The more we train ourselves to live with gratitude- for everything- the more reasons we’ll find to be happy.

Rabbi Dr. Yaakov Erenberg is the founder and head of the Erenberg Institute for Marriage Counseling and Family Studies