How to Overcome Social Anxiety: 10 Practical Tips for Building Confidence in Social Settings

Social Anxiety is defined as a fear of experiencing embarrassment or shame in social situations. Individuals with this form of anxiety often avoid social interactions, which leads to frustration and significant difficulties.

Following are some practical tips that can help you cope with social anxiety:

1. Self-Fulfilling Prophecy
   Approach a social event with the belief that you will find at least one interesting person to talk to.

2. Be Active
   Don’t wait for others to approach you. Try showing interest in others- even with just a few simple words. From time to time, add a few more sentences in conversation with those around you.

3. You're Not Alone
   In any social event, at least 30% of people are not confident in their ability to form social connections.

4. Accept Yourself as You Are
   Everyone has strengths and weaknesses. It’s what makes us unique!

5. Be Aware of Your Interpretations
   Not everything you perceive as rejection or being ignored is actually that. Even the most socially accepted people don’t always get the attention or responses they expect from others.

6. Project Calmness
   People who exude friendliness, warmth, and kindness naturally attract others. On the other hand, being distant, closed off, or rigid has the opposite effect. Try this: for just 3 minutes, smile at people around you- on the street, at school, or at work- and observe how they respond.

7. Move Around
   Don’t stay in one place. Walk around the room, switch seats, keep your body moving. Physical movement increases blood flow and reduces feelings of distress. It can also help you join new social circles that might interest you.

8. Listening is Powerful
   You don’t always need to talk. Most people prefer someone who listens. Showing empathy and attentiveness invites connection and builds relationships. In fact, people who talk too much can often push others away.

9. Use Humor
   Laugh at your own insecurities and don’t give them too much power. Blushing or slight stuttering actually triggers empathy and affection. It’s okay to admit you’re nervous- it often earns you more respect! The less you resist your natural reactions, the more likely they’ll fade over time, or disappear altogether.

10. Stay and Learn Instead of Escaping
    The more social situations you experience, the more you’ll slowly learn the language of social interaction- small talk, body language, and social cues. Eventually, you’ll realize people aren’t as scary as you thought. Give yourself time, and gradually spend more time in social settings. You’ll discover what kind of environments feel comfortable for you.

Orly Samira is a CBT therapist.