The Mitzvah of Making a Bride and Groom Happy

Do you have a wedding coming up? Did you know that it is a mitzvah to make the chatan and kallah (groom and bride) happy? Following are a collection of other Jewish laws related to weddings:

1. It is a great mitzvah to rejoice with the bride and groom and to dance before them, and the reward for this mitzvah is very great.

2. The mitzvah of rejoicing with the bride and groom includes praising them as well as dancing before them. Either one of these is sufficient in order to fulfill the mitzvah.

3. A Torah scholar or prominent person whose mere presence brings joy to the groom fulfills the mitzvah simply by attending the wedding.

4. Even someone who does not sit down for the wedding meal is obligated to bring joy to the bride and groom. A person who enjoys the meal but does not bring joy to the groom is guilty of transgression.

5. The obligation to bring joy to the bride and groom applies throughout all seven days of the wedding celebration, not just at the wedding itself.

6. It is permitted to lift the groom onto one's shoulders in celebration, but it is preferable to seat him on a chair and lift him that way.

7. Even if the groom's or bride's parent has passed away within 30 days of the date set for the wedding, it should not be postponed. The wedding should go ahead, with music and dancing, and this is a mitzvah. The same applies if a grandparent has recently passed away. 

8. With regard to the death of a grandparent, the parent of the bride or groom who is in mourning may attend the wedding if their absence would distress the bride/groom, but they should not participate in the meal.

9. A man should not dress up as a woman, or vice versa, even if their intention is to bring joy to the bride and groom.

10. It is forbidden to invite a magician to a wedding celebration who performs sleight of hand tricks using optical illusions and swift movements.

11. There is no question that according to Jewish law, mixed dancing at weddings is forbidden. This includes a wedding at which there is one circle of men and another of women, with no partition between them. Transgressing this is considered a great sin; in fact, even watching mixed dancing is forbidden.

12. If the bride or groom has secular relatives and they are concerned that people will, of their own accord, start mixed dancing, they should tell the band to stop playing immediately if mixed dancing begins. It is appropriate for all the friends of the bride and groom to dance with extra enthusiasm to deter mixed dancing.

13. It is strictly forbidden for women to dance around the bride at a wedding where there is no partition in place.

14. If a video recording is being made, care should be taken not to film the women's dancing, to ensure that male relatives of the bride and groom do not inadvertently view it. If the filming has already been done, the videographer should edit the video and separate the footage of the women.

15. It has become customary in many circles that male relatives wish the bride "mazel tov" at her wedding, and this is not considered immodest. It is also permitted to give her a blessing, even in her presence, as this is merely a prayer and not a greeting.

16. A groom who has female relatives who might kiss him after the chuppah should be prepared to avoid this by explaining that it is forbidden according to Jewish law. Similarly, he should avoid shaking hands with women, and the bride should not shake hands with men. This should all be done without creating hard feelings.