How Challah Baking Protected Me: A Personal Journey

It's only been two and a half years since I returned to tradition. I think to myself about how much precious time I wasted.

For 13 years, I studied Kabbalah. I wandered, searched, through a sea of currents. Not a single one captured my soul. Meanwhile, in my career, I lecture and lead workshops on self-awareness and guided imagery.

Then it happened. A deep understanding of the soul. Not suffering or illness, God forbid, but I awoke as if from a dream. Within a month, everything changed, including my husband. As one unit, we turned our lives upside down.

The kitchen became kosher, the living room transformed into a dining area with a library, and the wardrobe took on modesty. Just like that, no regrets. I piled up jeans and t-shirts, put them in bags, and parted from them with love.

My husband joined in, and together we worked diligently, as if awakened from a bad dream, running towards real life.

Being someone who loves to delve deeply, I decided to investigate the head covering in a spiritual sense. After understanding its depths, there was no hesitation. Within a week, a modest wig adorned my head.

I continued to explore and see how deep and rewarding the special mitzvahs for women are. It's no coincidence that Hashem granted us, women, several special mitzvahs. Family purity was adhered to meticulously, and observing Shabbat is the greatest gift that entered our lives. One mitzvah I decided to enhance and perform with intention was the mitzvah of separating challah.

The separation of challah is an auspicious time and an amazing spiritual elevation, much like purification in the mikvah.

Friday arrives. I finish my morning blessings and lovingly approach the bowl.

I've read quite a bit about the soul and its purpose here in the world. I understood that my soul descended, among all the soul sparks that came down here, to rectify, to choose between good and evil, and to mend what's broken within me, not physically, but in my traits.

I hold the sifter and sift the flour. A collection of tiny sparks creates the white flour, symbolizing all souls passing through the sifter. I truly feel how I'm performing my personal rectification work, separating good from evil.

The clean flour falls into the bowl just as the soul descends into the body.

I add the yeast to the flour, gaze at their grayness, and promptly add pure water akin to the Torah. Like a miracle, a resurrection, they come to life.

But not everything is rosy. After all, we're here to correct. And here, I want to share how the mitzvot protected me.

Over the last year, my monthly cycles were difficult and longer than usual. I went to a gynecologist, and a benign tumor was found. They explained that if I didn't remove my uterus, it might become malignant.

I didn't hesitate. I consulted a specialist and a hysterectomy was decided upon. After the surgery, which thank God went smoothly, the doctor approached me and said, "We removed everything except the ovaries, which are perfectly fine and protect you through the aging process. As far as I'm concerned, you can be discharged tomorrow," he added.

While lying in the hospital, my body rested but my thoughts did not. I reflected on what I had gone through. Why? How did they manage to save the ovaries?

I watched videos on challah baking on the Hidabroot website, and in one video a rabbanit appeared holding a sign, as if she wanted to shout at me. It read in large letters: "Challah Separation = Intact Ovaries."

Huge, warm tears ran down my face. I looked up as if in disbelief. Truly measure for measure.

"Now I understand," I addressed Hashem, almost out loud.

By observing the mitzvah of separating challah, I protected the vitality of my ovaries, even at my age, 49.

On the Friday I so eagerly awaited to perform the mitzvah of challah separation (and to continue protecting my ovaries, I thought with a smile), I stood in the kitchen, still in pain from the surgery, yet so happy to perform such an immense mitzvah and to understand my blessing.

I sift the flour, doing my personal rectification work, separating good from evil, trying to mend what I came to this world to do.

As I knead the dough, I thought, "Well, I've embraced the mitzvah of family purity. And my uterus?" I smiled, "It must have gone to someone who needs it to bring more children into the world."

Meanwhile, the dough rose, and with these insights in my heart, I separated the challah and thanked Hashem.

I thank You, living and eternal King.

Challah Baking Group - For hosting a challah baking group, call 073-2221290 or email at aviva@htv.co.il